Softened

I thought I’d rise from the rubble a victorious heroine  
The transformation of the wolf wasn’t for one night only  
I feel the sinew of my bones rebreaking and remolding to something new- something foreign  
I break , remodel, then I am steadfast  
I wonder will the wolf stay, will she last  
While I break I see all my cracks - truthfully in the past I’ve tried to fill them with anything that will do  
Paying everything I had to the takers due  
So i break and break and I will break again  
Yet I remember each break is only a remodeling to something new, wiser, lighter yet darker and all the while somehow softer  
Yes I sink to the rubble, struggle a bit and shakily stand back up  
This will not be my always  
Remember I am strengthening my wings for flight