reach out to you

it really is a shame
that i want to reach out to you
again.
exposing myself,
catching myself thinking about you.
it won’t change a thing,
it won’t matter.
do you think about me
the way i think about you
or do you even ignore me in your head?
i miss you,
i fucking miss you.
that way, it feels like you
don’t deserve that.
and why would you?
you don’t need me,
and you choose to neglect what we had.
yes, i‘m humiliated and hurt -
and i’ll express that.
i‘m not afraid, and i’m starting to get
that contacting you won’t change that.
sadly, you don’t seem to care -
you just keep forgetting me.

and as my sight blurs,
my voice is shaking,
i’m raising my hand
to wave goodbye.