deepundergroundpoetry.com
Nautical Sluice
Whittled, titillated,
demonstrative accolades.
Breaking spades in schools,
flash frying the batter,
lick it faster, see the saw horse whinny.
Double whammy the paddle,
"into the bottle scuttlebutt"
and swim a little harder!
The corporeal ladder
the 'gone but never forgotten,'
I thought then, begat severed head.
Uncle Slaughter, missing driver,
somewhere it shines 'tween hammerhead
spikes, the seaweed soiree,
and muddied sky slice.
demonstrative accolades.
Breaking spades in schools,
flash frying the batter,
lick it faster, see the saw horse whinny.
Double whammy the paddle,
"into the bottle scuttlebutt"
and swim a little harder!
The corporeal ladder
the 'gone but never forgotten,'
I thought then, begat severed head.
Uncle Slaughter, missing driver,
somewhere it shines 'tween hammerhead
spikes, the seaweed soiree,
and muddied sky slice.
Published 13th Apr 2023
Author's Note
flowering, flowing, drowning
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 4
reading list entries 1
comments 8
reads 504
Commenting Preference:
The author is looking for friendly feedback.
16th Apr 2023 3:12pm
16th Apr 2023 4:00pm
Everyone in my life I left read this, said they didn't like it, 'cuz they couldn't understand it!
LIG BIKE 😇
LIG BIKE 😇
16th Apr 2023 4:02pm
I read it at least 5 times
Each time I liked it better
You're a Firestarter
Like
Each time I liked it better
You're a Firestarter
Like
16th Apr 2023 4:34pm
I can see how they didn't get it...your metaphors are deep but not obtrusive, I commend your skills
16th Apr 2023 4:35pm
16th Apr 2023 7:50pm
Hullo
quite the ride, it is one for the multiple reads. the words are great, appear random at first but no so. punctuation works very well
good stuff
quite the ride, it is one for the multiple reads. the words are great, appear random at first but no so. punctuation works very well
good stuff
16th Apr 2023 9:06pm
I'm glad it was an enjoyable ride 😉 thanks for giving my stream of consciousness a chance
4th May 2023 6:14am
This almost reminds me of Aesop Rock, with the seemingly esoteric references of emotion, depicted with a "collage" of language. Going through discourse and direction of questioning morality in the world, this is original, unique, individual, and holds its own. Taunting; established. Specific vocabulary, but very concise. Each line has a lot of meaning. Concrete-hard and compacted metaphors. Transitioning format. There is a lot here. Thank you for sharing!
