Little Debbie Doesn't Have Wings

Could you talk a little icky with me? Defaming my thesis and Little Debbie Banana Marshmallow Pies. She doesn't have wings. Forgive me, Father, I have sinned. Knocking off a bag of Cheetos, gluten-free. I opened my mouth and they just popped in. Could you spare an absolution and Big Red? I could have had a carrot, but I ain't a freaking rabbit. Is "freaking," a naughty word? Isn't confessing so cliché and do I need to practice, "Confessing 101?"