deepundergroundpoetry.com
Amour fou (2)
when we form the first few letters
to express this frenzy we're feeling
the friction will incite Shiva-step incendiaries
and scatter rose petal apocalypse
decode the secrets of overexposure
by candlelight
breathe heavy
between lifetimes
sweet whisper destruction
creating a cosmos in my earlobe
unfold before me my beloved
allow your moonlit need
to usher my aggression outward
towards oblivion
rest the full expanse of your flora
on to my chest
rising with the rhythm of my inhale
then seed your regeneration
on the wind as it exits
please do not pretend
in this sacred space
that we aren't split atom reactions
and let utter lust
disintegrate
everything of us again
to express this frenzy we're feeling
the friction will incite Shiva-step incendiaries
and scatter rose petal apocalypse
decode the secrets of overexposure
by candlelight
breathe heavy
between lifetimes
sweet whisper destruction
creating a cosmos in my earlobe
unfold before me my beloved
allow your moonlit need
to usher my aggression outward
towards oblivion
rest the full expanse of your flora
on to my chest
rising with the rhythm of my inhale
then seed your regeneration
on the wind as it exits
please do not pretend
in this sacred space
that we aren't split atom reactions
and let utter lust
disintegrate
everything of us again
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 5
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comments 11
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The author encourages honest critique.
rose petal apocalypse
5th Apr 2012 7:30am
I wish I had more to offer than "simply beautiful" but truly it is. Love the universal metaphors, gives wonderful scope. :)
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re: rose petal apocalypse
5th Apr 2012 8:05am
:)
5th Apr 2012 7:50am
LightBaron
A tour de force.
If one could create art with anti-matter
this is probably how it would look like.
A memorable read. A potent write. Congratulations.
Respect,
Sumeet
p.s-I was a little unsure about the
use of 'utter' in the last stanza.
Just me.
A tour de force.
If one could create art with anti-matter
this is probably how it would look like.
A memorable read. A potent write. Congratulations.
Respect,
Sumeet
p.s-I was a little unsure about the
use of 'utter' in the last stanza.
Just me.
1
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re: :)
5th Apr 2012 8:08am
well im blushing..ha- thanks SP
and your absolutly right about that "utter" without it im not completely happy w the flow, but with it i have to rush a bit to make it fit...scratching temple as i type
and your absolutly right about that "utter" without it im not completely happy w the flow, but with it i have to rush a bit to make it fit...scratching temple as i type
boom
5th Apr 2012 8:28am
sorry, "utter" is perfect, the 'us' throws that line's rhythm for me. it might be because i just woke up but... it doesn't fit. [:
otherwise, this beauty is a breathing passion (still in a that voice that's a step removed) with a 'wow' title. belongs in the erotic section. [:
otherwise, this beauty is a breathing passion (still in a that voice that's a step removed) with a 'wow' title. belongs in the erotic section. [:
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re: boom
5th Apr 2012 9:05am
righto...the us has got to go...hadnt even thought of that...was stuck on utter...and the removal i think gives the statement a different power(concentration on the "lust" other than the "us"...which is obviously preferred)
++++
5th Apr 2012 1:11pm
It's a chain reaction of flowers and whispers and breathing. Grateful that you have split the curtain of our mundane world with it.
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...
5th Apr 2012 6:17pm
If i was to cut the meat off the bones i would definitely say it belonged in the love category, but that's just what i see.
Really well expressed. Great blooming piece!
Really well expressed. Great blooming piece!
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...
5th Apr 2012 8:41pm
glad this resonated as a romantic/love feeling, as that is def what i was going for...now "erotic" thats just gonna down right get to my head!
note:"amour fou" is a french word translated as crazy love/crazy passion
i have done a couple now with this title, and i have to admit that i was heavily influenced by Hakim Bey in his book "T.A.Z.the temporary autonomous zone" i recommend the book. especially if you are into chaos theories and anarchism...also its written in beautiful prose
note:"amour fou" is a french word translated as crazy love/crazy passion
i have done a couple now with this title, and i have to admit that i was heavily influenced by Hakim Bey in his book "T.A.Z.the temporary autonomous zone" i recommend the book. especially if you are into chaos theories and anarchism...also its written in beautiful prose
utter
did u consider capitalizing the word Shiva and chose against it? tell me more about ur intentions. it's a powerful concept (to the point of invoking/naming God for some)to let it blend in like that. just wondering...
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re: utter
6th Apr 2012 5:18am
i did consider it...and wanted it more as shrapnel than specific deity..shiva dance symbol as destructive force