deepundergroundpoetry.com
Me and Mrs Grundy
I smacked that very naughty girl
(‘I’m glad that discipline’s still taught!’)
and then I let the night unfurl
(‘she must regret having been caught!’)
and then I did some other stuff
(‘...surely one smack was enough?’)
I stuck it in her hairy muff
(‘I didn’t know girls still wore them...’)
and made that beaver sticky as
(‘wait, she keeps a beaver as a pet?’)
and then I nutted on her tits
(‘this is getting out of hand,
it doesn’t even rhyme!’)
I gave that girl a real good time
(‘well that’s a start I guess...’)
and wrote this poem just for her
(‘this is meant to be a verse?’)
while picking at my hairy pit
(‘good lord, erotic verse is shit.’)
(‘I’m glad that discipline’s still taught!’)
and then I let the night unfurl
(‘she must regret having been caught!’)
and then I did some other stuff
(‘...surely one smack was enough?’)
I stuck it in her hairy muff
(‘I didn’t know girls still wore them...’)
and made that beaver sticky as
(‘wait, she keeps a beaver as a pet?’)
and then I nutted on her tits
(‘this is getting out of hand,
it doesn’t even rhyme!’)
I gave that girl a real good time
(‘well that’s a start I guess...’)
and wrote this poem just for her
(‘this is meant to be a verse?’)
while picking at my hairy pit
(‘good lord, erotic verse is shit.’)
Published 9th Dec 2022
Author's Note
A rather juvenile and mean-spirited piss take of “erotic poetry”.
From Wikipedia:
“Mrs Grundy is a figurative name for an extremely conventional or priggish person, a personification of the tyranny of conventional propriety. A tendency to be overly fearful of what others might think is sometimes referred to as grundyism.
Mrs Grundy originated as an unseen character in Thomas Morton's 1798 five-act comedy Speed the Plough. References to Mrs Grundy were eventually so well established in the public imagination that in Samuel Butler's 1872 novel Erewhon, the goddess Ydgrun, an anagram for Grundy, dictates social norms. As a figure of speech, "Mrs Grundy" can be found throughout the English-speaking world.”
From Wikipedia:
“Mrs Grundy is a figurative name for an extremely conventional or priggish person, a personification of the tyranny of conventional propriety. A tendency to be overly fearful of what others might think is sometimes referred to as grundyism.
Mrs Grundy originated as an unseen character in Thomas Morton's 1798 five-act comedy Speed the Plough. References to Mrs Grundy were eventually so well established in the public imagination that in Samuel Butler's 1872 novel Erewhon, the goddess Ydgrun, an anagram for Grundy, dictates social norms. As a figure of speech, "Mrs Grundy" can be found throughout the English-speaking world.”
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