deepundergroundpoetry.com
November 11th (Our Last Visit)
Alone in a room
Stained glass wall to my right
Nothing but prayer bowls and the exit in sight
Over the intercom,
"Code Blue in the NICU"
The unrelated loss of another
Reminds me of the impending loss of you, too
What am I even doing in here?
I do not really know what to think
If I should pray, or how I will pray
Really, what good will my wishes bring?
Existing in another area
White halls with windows and doors to other dimensions
Neither here, nor there
Eternally suspended
How can we leave you alone?
I try to find comfort in thinking:
I am sure you will let your angels show you the way
Truly peaceful navigating
As far as I can see,
The only things keeping you company
Are the IV drip and cloud screensaver playing on TV
Feeling ashamed of my sadness
I go to cry in the nearby bathroom
Pain-stung, bloodshot eyes
Newfound hurt draining from an emotional wound
I shake myself out of it
Attempt to regain composure
A moment of acceptance, not wasting time
This will be my closure
A lasting goodbye
To find, just seven days later
You will depart here, a new start there
A chance to be with your Savior
November 11th, our last visit
I have nevermore felt so empty-hearted
Stained glass wall to my right
Nothing but prayer bowls and the exit in sight
Over the intercom,
"Code Blue in the NICU"
The unrelated loss of another
Reminds me of the impending loss of you, too
What am I even doing in here?
I do not really know what to think
If I should pray, or how I will pray
Really, what good will my wishes bring?
Existing in another area
White halls with windows and doors to other dimensions
Neither here, nor there
Eternally suspended
How can we leave you alone?
I try to find comfort in thinking:
I am sure you will let your angels show you the way
Truly peaceful navigating
As far as I can see,
The only things keeping you company
Are the IV drip and cloud screensaver playing on TV
Feeling ashamed of my sadness
I go to cry in the nearby bathroom
Pain-stung, bloodshot eyes
Newfound hurt draining from an emotional wound
I shake myself out of it
Attempt to regain composure
A moment of acceptance, not wasting time
This will be my closure
A lasting goodbye
To find, just seven days later
You will depart here, a new start there
A chance to be with your Savior
November 11th, our last visit
I have nevermore felt so empty-hearted
Published 9th Oct 2022
Author's Note
This poem is about the last time I saw my grandmother. She passed away the week following my visit, and this is the first time I've ever written about it.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 2
reading list entries 1
comments 5
reads 340
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
9th Oct 2022 5:51pm
Wow. You just added a crack inside my heart. Your painful write is that precise.
And, you have no idea how exact your choice of your picture matches this write.
I almost feel guilty getting any positives from your write. So aside from the subject, your write is brutally accurate. Your heart is as big as your mind. What a perfect balance you have.
And to the subject; I'm sorry for you, and for her, because of Death. It has no forgiveness. We can only hope for its patience.
Keep writing. You are brighter than all sums of darkness.
And, you have no idea how exact your choice of your picture matches this write.
I almost feel guilty getting any positives from your write. So aside from the subject, your write is brutally accurate. Your heart is as big as your mind. What a perfect balance you have.
And to the subject; I'm sorry for you, and for her, because of Death. It has no forgiveness. We can only hope for its patience.
Keep writing. You are brighter than all sums of darkness.
11th Oct 2022 3:13am
Thank you for your consistent encouragement and advice! I really do appreciate it. I will definitely keep writing and letting it all out, for sure.
13th Jan 2023 1:18am
Thank you for submitting your poem to my competition, APD, and my condolences for your loss. Your poem depicted the cold and clinical aspect of how death in a medical setting is already lonesome, but it's also heartless to an extent. Your grief is also obvious, so here's a virtual hug from a fellow member.
14th Jan 2023 11:34pm
LunasChild,
Thank you for your kind words, and for coming up with such a great competition prompt.
I'm truly grateful for the fact that writing has provided me a consistent outlet to work through my more "difficult" emotions. It's been pretty cool to find that my poems are like little time capsules that connect me to earlier parts of my healing journey. Reading them back allows me the chance to reflect, and feel at peace knowing I've gained a more hopeful outlook on life.
Take care,
Tierra
Thank you for your kind words, and for coming up with such a great competition prompt.
I'm truly grateful for the fact that writing has provided me a consistent outlet to work through my more "difficult" emotions. It's been pretty cool to find that my poems are like little time capsules that connect me to earlier parts of my healing journey. Reading them back allows me the chance to reflect, and feel at peace knowing I've gained a more hopeful outlook on life.
Take care,
Tierra
14th Jan 2023 11:39pm
