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The Second Life of Vlad Dracula: Part Two
- The Second Life of Vlad Dracula: Part Two -
The year of 1486 had begun in sorrow for me, with my heart and soul having not fully recovered from the loss of my beloved wives... leaving me trapped in the past, and unable to contemplate a future that I could so much as bear. My name had previously been Vlad Dracula, and perhaps that is still who I was. For the longest time, after falsifying my death in order to begin anew, I had gone by the new name of Radómer Farkas, a name meaning “Happy Wolf”. I was far from happy now, and the irony of having an assumed name such as this one weighed heavily upon me, serving only to increase my depressed state of mind. I was living in the great castle at Tiffauges, in France, having fled my native lands years ago. I was no longer the young idealistic warrior that I once had been, and I found each day difficult to bear. A different sort of man might have sought some diversion or another, by this point. Anything, to keep the darker memories from tormenting one too much. I could not, for the ones I had loved and lost had been to me my entire world, my entire reason for existing. Their smiles, their kindness to me, even all their quirks and eccentricities, had endeared them to my heart so deeply that there was no future for me that they were not a part of. I was haunted by them now, both literally and figuratively. A shell of all I had in the past been... and yet, I kept on living. I ate, if perhaps but little, and I still rode out by horse into the countryside on occasion, sometimes hoping that I might encounter my doom upon such outings. Yet, I always managed to return to the castle safely, my life continuing regardless of my will growing weaker. A young girl came to visit the castle one day, a girl by the name of Judith, who had heard various tales and stories while at her home village, regarding the castle at Tiffauges... and its' mysterious lord. I was that lord, and so it was only polite for me to receive her. Few servants remained, most having left when they saw my mood darkening and my sanity becoming more unhinged. Those who did stay, were of the sort of disposition that made them strong, and able to deal with even the wildest varieties of madness. But the ones who had left, carried certain exaggerated stories with them, and that is how Judith came to learn of the events at the castle to begin with. Events that made her quite concerned. Yet why would any stranger such as herself care? She knew little to nothing about me, and yet here she was, claiming to be in a state of worry and fear. I need to learn more, and thus it was that I ended up meeting the person that would become my final wife prior to my death. The story of which I shall so reveal within these events.
It was the first month of springtime... winter's snows having melted away, bringing with it a fresh sort of warmth to the land. I had been out and about all that day, though I told no one where I had gone and kept to myself the purpose of my outing. As I returned to the castle in the early afternoon, the skies had become cloudy and dreary looking, which darkened my spirits even as I had sought to raise them. After bringing my horse to the stables for the stable girl to take charge of, I went inside the keep and made for the kitchen to see what there was to drink. The former stable boy, had left my service just the previous month, unable to bear any longer the memory of his having witnessed the death of my sister Iohanna... who had also become of my wives prior to her tragic end. Though we had put down the horse that had caused the accident, it did not seem to have been enough to make things better. You cannot, after all, so easily move past such things merely by seeking justice in and of itself. Justice cannot bring breath back to the lungs of the dead, and in my growing insanity I had attempted to do just that on many occasions. To restore life, to the ones I had lost. Always, it ended in failure however, no matter the rituals or spells that I attempted. No matter how much blood I offered the dark old gods! The fire was warm in the old hearth of the castle's keep, although my heart I feared might grow cold ere long. It was then that I was told that I had a visitor, and that is how I came to meet Judith. “Show her in to me.” I said calmly to the servant who had informed me of her arrival. I took a sip of wine in order to steel myself for the meeting that was imminent. I had become somewhat introverted, and was unused to social pleasantries. I would have to pretend to be more used to them, if only so that my visitor might not be too much disconcerted.
The castle itself was an imposing structure! It stood in the center of a great massif of granite rock that extended from Mortagne-sur-Sèvre to Clisson in the Vendée. There were, of course, the dark dungeons, the high gate tower, the mighty curtain walls with their hollow towers, and the hallowed chapel that had not seen use in countless decades, at least not in the traditional sense. In structure, the keep resembled a great towering cube of stone and brick, with semi-cylindrical turrets strengthening its' sides. The only way to reach the keep... was by way of a narrow high gateway, which opened well onto the inside of the guardhouse that was on the first floor of the gate tower at the entrance to the castle itself. As you might well see, one had to be determined indeed, to seek an audience with one who lived in such a location! I could actually understand it when Iohanna had showed up with her companion Luna... back when both yet lived... after all, they had a good reason to seek me out regardless of the difficulty. The castle was in the early stages of disrepair, and beginning to show the signs of its' age. The place was terrible to look upon now, although still pleasant enough on the inside. It was as if the place was rotting along with my will to live, and that it was dying along with me. I could not imagine what might motivate a child such as Judith to come hither. And a child she was, a little girl of only twelve years. Yet she had the heart and spirit of a woman twice her age! The servant ushered her in to where I sat at the great wooden chair that was before the fireplace. She regarded the faded wall tapestries, the elaborately patterned rugs, and the ornate furniture with a slight hint of appreciation. Perhaps she knew something of the history, and of the antiquity, of this place and all that lay within it? She was a pretty child, to be certain... at least to me! I knew, however, that most might not have found her so. She had a chubby, rounded face and a bit of a stocky build to her body. Her lips were plump, her nose broad, and her skin dusky-toned. Her eyes were hazel in color, her red hair long, curly and wild looking. The child wore a long knee-length tunic which was deep blue in color, with gold trim. It was belted at the waist with a lighter blue sash. Beneath the tunic, she wore a pair of baggy looking tan colored trousers and had a pair of brown sandals upon her feet. She carried a walking staff in her hands, and looked quite weary form her travel to the castle. I did not know why, but something about her reminded me of a gypsy girl, and in turn that reminded me of the part of the world that I was forced to leave behind seemingly long ago. She introduced herself to me politely, her voice pleasant to hear: “My lord... I am called Judith... and I hail from a tiny village of not any real import, so I shall not bore you with its' name. You have never been there, and those from there have not had many dealings with you or anyone else from this place. Regardless of that, there are some of my village... who have received former servants that once had been in your employ. They spoke of a great many terrible things, and it seemed that a few were not of sound mind when they spoke thus. As you can guess, I was told to tell you this. None of those are my own words! My mother and father had a mind to come here themselves to talk to you, but I told them I could handle it. That I was old enough to do this for them. What we all want to know in my village is merely this! Are you, sir, in fact the Devil?”
What had those servants told her? Likely that I was cursed, and that my wives had perished merely by having been associated with me. None of the servants knew of my true identity as Vlad Dracula! Yet, I could not help but wonder what lunacy had beset those who left, that they would make such a claim of me. I asked Judith what caused people to think this about me, and she confirmed what I suspected, also adding: “Our next door neighbor's youngest boy even thinks you might have killed your wives with evil spells or some other kind of dark magic. My lord, I know how all of this sounds, and that is why we did not take this to the Church or to the secular authorities. It is merely rumor, not truth. I am here... to learn what the truth actually is.” I nodded my head in understanding, and replied: “Nothing I can simply say, will prove my innocence to you, or to your people. But if you stay with me here for a time, live here in my company for a while, you will see for yourself all that transpires within these walls. I will ask of you nothing, expect nothing from you, and when you feel you have learned all... you may go as you please.”
She appeared agreeable to my suggestion, stating: “I think I could do that well enough, sir! Show me to my room then, and tell me if there are any laws or rules that I will need to follow during my stay.” I thereafter replied: “As I said, I ask nothing of you, and expect nothing from me... only, if you should at all happen to venture into the cellars, in particular our wine cellar, and should you find there certain old doors that are locked. Metal doors, all of them! Do not attempt to open them, nor to ask anyone for the keys by which they could be opened. There is a similar place on an upper floor of the keep here. There is a hallway there, and a certain room at the end of it, which is off limits. The door to that room is just as locked, and the key is not to be asked for. Those keys are four in number, and they are to be found in my possession alone. Three other keys also, are forbidden! The key to the chapel, which is a place we no longer make use of. The key to the dungeons, which are dangerous to enter. And the key to the very tallest of all the castle's towers. That tower has been out of use since last year, and is not safe to walk in due to its' current state. Naturally, all seven of those doors are locked securely, and thus you should not have any problems with leaving them as such. I merely wish to make you aware of the reason why this is so.” With that out of the way, the little girl smiled and I showed her to the guest room myself. I was beginning to mistrust my servants now, and thought it best to conduct all dealings with Judith without them being involved. “What is your name, my lord?” she asked me as she laid down on the bed in the guest room in order to relax and rest for a few hours. Before leaving the room, I responded: “My name is Radómer Farkas, and I am originally from Hungary. I came here primarily at the insistence of my late wife Carina, whose kin it was that considered this place to be their home. Now my home, to which I do bid you the warmest of welcomes! Now rest for a bit, if you must, and seek me if you have a mind to.” I left her to her relaxation and tried to mentally prepare myself for another intolerably lonely evening. On seeing that girl, I felt the stirrings of old desires beginning within me again. I would later take a whip to my back and attempt to lash such thoughts out of me, but even a thousand pains would not erase them.
Later that night... I found myself unable to sleep, tormented by night terrors so awful that I believed I was beset by demons out of Hell itself. I went out that night into the countryside in order to lose myself in the night air, and felt intoxicated by the glistening stars and the brilliance of the moon high above the land. I ventured into a stretch of woods, and thereafter came to a small cottage. The wind was howling, and I was almost frightened by the sound that it was making that night. I would, perhaps, have felt a bit stronger... had I not otherwise been alone. I detested loneliness, and the dread that it always managed to fill me with! There were the sounds of animals scattering in the underbrush, as I walked up the cottage. There was candlelight coming from one of the windows, and inside I could see a beautiful women who sat by a fireplace reading from a small scroll. It was rare to find peasants who could read at all, and the woman was indeed a peasant by the style of her dress. I wondered if she might have been a witch... for many witches I had known were quite highly literate. She looked lovely in the warm light! She wore a long gray skirt which was rather frilly near the bottom... and a white low cut blouse, with wide sleeves. Over the blouse she wore a gray bodice that was at present unlaced for comfort. She had luxurious curly red hair that reminded me of Judith's, and in her hair she wore several scarlet colored ribbons. Scarlet upon red flame, I thought to myself! She had a bit of a curvy build to her, and rather pleasing features. She had a healthy tone to her skin, and a ready smile as she noticed me regarding her. Despite her smile she appeared startled, and covered her chest with a nearby blanket. “What are you doing here, sir?” she inquired of me. “Are you from one of the villages, or do you hail from the castle?” she added. I told her that I indeed hailed from the castle, over which I was the lord thereof. “My lord... I am your most loyal subject.” she said, closing her eyes and nodding her head politely. My attire was that of a nobleman and so the woman took me at my word. I inquired of her: “Where is your husband, good lady? Or do you in fact live alone here!” to which she replied: “I am married, sir. My husband... is a woodcutter, by trade.”
It was then, that the man came home and saw me standing there outside, talking with his wife through the cottage window. He set his ax down upon noticing how I was dressed, and greeted me warmly. “My lord, welcome to our house! What can we do for you, at this late hour?” I said unto him kindly: “Good sir, your wife is a most charming lady, and it appears quite intelligent as well. She is also an angel to so look upon, and I hope that I did not do any discourtesy by staring at her as I might have been. I am from the castle, as I informed her, and am the lord thereof.” the woodcutter was a skinny looking man, and I thought he appeared ill-suited for his chosen profession. He responded to me, so saying: “You do her no discourtesy by speaking as you do, my lord! She and I, were wed just this past week, and moved out to her cottage here... to start our lives right and proper.” I asked him why they had not come to ask me for my blessing on their union, to which he curiously stated: “That is an old custom, my lord! The one who ruled here of old imposed it on occasion they say, but we are... you must forgive us... unused to the old customs.” I reminded him of another custom then, saying that as recompense for their ignorance of my wish to bless their wedding, I expected to be allowed to lie with his wife on a night of my choosing. I stated in closing: “Look at it as a compliment... to your fine choice in a wife!” the man's lower lip was quivering, his hands shaking with fear. He averted my gaze and said: “Oh please my lord! Do not insist on this... it is within your right, certainly, as the lord of this land. But it will dishonor our marriage, and cause my wife to break faith with God, before whom she was sworn to me.” I than informed the man of how I had witnessed his wife reading from that scroll she still clutched. “Some might think it above her station to be so learned. If you wish no one to learn of this, then you will allow me my night of pleasure with your wife.” that was the threat I employed. The man replied: “If word got out... she is a follower of the old ways, sir. A heretic, by the Church's standards. Yet, I love her all the same!” I assured him, that no word ever would. He turned to walk away then, muttering: “I will go back out into the woods for the remainder of the night, sir. If it will still your tongue, then do whatever you like. Just, do not expect me to stay and watch.” I intended for it be that night in any case, and once the man went back into the dark of the forest, I entered the cottage, and regarded his wife with lust in my eyes. She sat upon her chair... her eyes wide with terror as she clutched the blanket over her body. I tore the scroll out of her hands and then the blanket from her grasp. She was not a strong woman by any stretch of the imagination. “Please my lord! Do not do this, I beg of you.” she pleased, yet I remained firm in my resolve. “You will be the means by which I will keep my nightmares at bay this evening.” I informed her, and dragged from from the chair, throwing her unto the crude straw bed that lay across the room. I tore away her bodice, ripped the front of her blouse open, revealing her ample bosom, and forced her legs open. She did not resist.... yet even so, I was perhaps a bit rough with her. I pulled her skirts up to her waist, then proceeded quite cruelly to have my way with her. All the time, imagining that it was really Judith whom I coupled with.
I fell asleep in that woman's arms that night... and made my way back to the castle at first light. I had no nightmares, yet I realized that in the heat of my lust I never even learned the woman's name. Had I become such a beast, in my grief? I wondered. That was the day when Judith wished for me to show her around the castle. She was dressed mostly similar to the sort of attire she had on the day before, having thus brought with her a few changes of clothing. Only, this time... she wore a forest green tunic with no trim, and a pair of baggy white trousers tucked into a pair of brown ankle boots. I was reminded, of my first wife... Maria... who always loved to wear clothing that was forest green in color, along with other shades of green as well. This enamored me even more deeply with my young guest. I took her through all of the rooms, chambers, and halls of the castle that were not locked. I explained each of them to her and showed her that indeed there was nothing peculiar going on in my home. I ended the tour at last, in the castle library, where I showed her my collection of various old books, scrolls, and parchments. She could not read, I then discovered, but was impressed with the collection regardless of that shortcoming.
“It is magnificent!” the girl remarked, seemingly astonished. She then inquired as to where I was the previous night, and I told her that I was out hunting. In a way, this was not a lie. Judith was displeased, it seemed, by something and I thought it prudent to ask her what bothered her so much. She then told me, in a somewhat nervous manner: “My lord... I know I should not be asking this of you, since you did tell me it was forbidden! But, could I just once learn what lies behind the seven locked doors? After that I am certain that I could honestly tell my people that... indeed... they have nothing to fear, and that all is well with the castle and its' lord.” I cautioned her not to ask this of me, and explained: “There are things behind those doors, that no child should see.” to which she said defiantly: “I am not afraid! And I am a lot less of a child, than you think me to be. In my twelve years of life... I have seen things that would in truth drive some grown women mad. I have seen death, and worse than death.” She had tears streaming down her cheeks as she confided that in me. She was far too mature for one so young! I dried her tears and said to her: “Now there, there! Do not cry, girl. I have seen much, as well. I will tell you what... if, after remaining here with me for the next three months, you have proven to me that you are indeed of a strong stomach and even stronger will, then I will myself unlock each of the locked doors, and so allow you to behold their grim secrets. For they are grim indeed! Is that agreeable to you?” She nodded, and told me that it was. I then, on a sudden impulse, kissed her cheek and caressed her hair. She blushed a bit, and her breath quickened. Yet, she did not seem to mind this attention! I was glad. Over those next three months, we grew closer and closer as I found myself sharing with Judith more and more about not only the castle and its' history, as much as I myself had learned of it, but also regarding my own past. It been long since I had felt I could open up to another living soul, yet this girl was so easy to speak with!
By the time that the three months had passed, I had already confided in the girl about my true identity, and she thankfully had never heard of Vlad Dracula before, so she was not judgmental upon this reveal. She knew mostly all of the events of my life by that point... all the worst things that I had done, as well as all of the best. I left out only the vile act I had committed upon the woodcutter's wife, since it pained me to think of having done such a thing, despite that the law of the land said I had the right to. Had she known I had done it because the woman reminded me of her, I suspected she would have found it even more perverse. Upon learning of the losses I had suffered in life, in particular the loss of Maria, and the other women I had come to love so deeply... Judith confessed unto me that she wished that she had the power to bring joy and happiness back to my heart. “You have suffered more than one lifetime's worth of pain, my lord Dracula...” she told me one evening, as we sat together in the living area after supper. She added: “I would truly give all that I am, if I thought that I could turn your sad, perpetual frown into a bright and contented smile.” We were mutually falling in love, I sensed. I said unto her: “I shall never ask you for all that you are, but if I could... I would ask, for your hand in marriage. You are different, in so many ways, from others I have known! You have a sorrow in your heart that calls to mine, and I also would... had I the power to do so... ease that pain that you never speak to me about. Perhaps together... as man and wife... we might bring peace to each other's hearts, at last!” She blushed more than I had at all seen her do previously, and was at a loss for words. She then spoke, her voice filled with a tone that told me how surprised she was at what I was offering her: “Oh my lord... Vlad!... I would be delighted to become your wife. I am considered... undesirable... for marriage back in my village in any case. All because of that pain I find it so hard to speak of. But since we are to be wed it seems, I feel that I have to confide in you why it is that I perhaps seem so mature for my age.” She then told me her secret, and it was terrible indeed. Her father had raped her when she was only ten years old, and because she was no longer a virgin, she was deemed unsuitable for marriage. The act was blamed upon her brother, who was imprisoned for the incestuous crime. Her innocence stolen at so young an age, her mind snapped... and she became gloomy, and began to act more like a grown woman than the child she had once been.
“It was not my ravishment that matured me mentally, but how I attempted to cope with the memories of it. My father, was not a gentle man... and he harmed my body a great deal, by what he did with me.” That was the revelation that made me see Judith in a whole new light. I was now determined to be all that she desired in life, and more. We held a private ceremony, just outside the castle's chapel. Not one of the villagers were invited, nor anyone of the girl's family. Although word was sent to them, to inform them of our decision to wed. A generous amount of money was paid to her parents, so that they would see this as a beneficial union for them as well. However, I had other plans in mind, for Judith's odious father! Yet, those would have to wait until after the wedding. Judith wore a very beautiful flowing white gown for the occasion, with a crown of white flowers in her ever wild looking, curly red hair. A silver sash belt was tied around her waist, and silver colored dress shoes were upon her feet. She was a vision of such loveliness, that I gasped when I beheld her on that day. I cannot the recall the day exactly, nor the month... time had no meaning for me any longer by that point. I only remember that it was a warm and pleasant day outside, when the ceremony binding us together was held. When I kissed her with all the passion in my heart, and embraced her with all the intensity that I had longed desired to share with her... it was the first time I had been truly happy since long before the deaths of my previous wives. Our night together was passionate, intense, and yet still I was mindful of her young age and made certain to do things in such a way that she was comfortable with the pleasures we enjoyed. Indeed, she spoke true to me, she was no virgin... but I did not mind that. Had she been a harlot, I would have loved her all the same! I did not judge the worth of a girl in the same way that other men did. The worth of her soul was enough for me, and I found that to be quite priceless. At the climax of our lovemaking, I almost felt as if our souls had become one. I gazed into her soft, hazel eyes, and I whispered to her: “I love you, oh so very much, my Judith! I am yours, even beyond this life's ending.” and I knew that Maria would not at all have minded this. I spoke in truth to Judith, and found... that perhaps I could forget the past entirely.
Five days after our wedding night... I had Judith's father brought to the castle, where I made the child face her father with what he had done to her. At first, he denied the deed entirely, but he was a poor liar and eventually slipped with his words, telling the girl wickedly that it would have been better, for him, had she been born mute so that what passed between them might never be known. I then said unto him: “What exactly did pass between you, that requires such silence?” and he at last admitted to the act. He claimed that he had been drunk at the time, and that it had been the drink that made him do it. Now, at last, I had the legal right to punish him for having harmed his daughter. I said to Judith: “I promised you that had you proved able to bear it, I would show you fully what lies behind the seven locked doors. Let us go down to the dungeons now! The servants, shall bring your father along with us.” The servants did come and restrain the wicked man with shackles, and so they bore him on down to the dungeons, which I unlocked for the first time in seemingly forever. I advised Judith to remain outside the door if she was at all squeamish, but she insisted bravely: “No, my love! I will not wait outside... I want to see that my father is punished, with my own eyes. I want to look in his eyes and know that he suffers... just as he so looked into mine, when he made me suffer.” The man was fat, and as disgusting to look upon as he had acted. I ordered him chained to the wall of a cell in the dungeons, and had the servants bring forth the instruments of torture, which I showed to him, explaining all that I was about to do in gruesome detail. It had the effect of causing the man to urinate out of fear. Judith said calmly to me: “Let us begin... my love!” and she made the first cut into her father's flesh, quite on her own initiative. I was impressed at the very sheer precision of her skill with the implement. “That was for my stolen virtue!” she screamed, spitting up into his face as she walked away. I had never seen her angry before, and her fury was almost beautiful to behold. I then proceeded to slowly flay the man alive, also castrating him in such a way that his penis was removed as well as his testicles. He shrieked, cried, and whimpered pitifully before dying.
The man's remains were nailed to the door of the family's cottage, with a note nailed unto the bloody, skinless corpse stating what his crime had been, and that now such crimes would be punishable only by death, for so long as I was lord of that castle and those lands. The man's flesh was fed to wild pigs, and the pigs were slaughtered. The meat of the pigs was then given to Judith's mother, and she was ordered to eat of it in punishment for having kept her husband's crime a secret, and for having allowed one who was innocent to be blamed for it. I was severe when it came to justice! And that is why people feared in those days to displease me. Judith's brother had died in prison, and so with this act... two evils had been avenged. Once we had spent a good week putting the memory of those events out of our minds, Judith asked me if I might be willing to share with her the secrets that lay behind the six remaining doors. I agreed that now it was time to, that she was indeed strong enough to bear the knowledge. We decided, that first it should be the chapel that we went to. I gave the key ring to my young wife, and when we so reached the chapel's doors I bade her unlock them. She did as instructed, and we entered that forsaken place. The altar had been desecrated by Luna and I back when she yet lived. We had decided that all the ways of the Church were corrupt and wicked, and so in honor of the ancient ways we truly followed... we had performed animal sacrifices upon the Church's altar, and used the blood to paint upon it every sort of arcane, mystical diagram, symbol and seal that we knew of. It was heresy, and we did not care! The previous religious tapestries had been torn down, and in their place I had new tapestries created... these, bearing upon them scenes depicting seeming forests of tall wooden stakes upon which Turkish soldiers were impaled. Some also depicted scenes of wretched looking nobles attempting to build the foundations of a castle with their bare hands. Things that referred to events from my time as the Prince of Wallachia. How I had dealt with the Turks that were invading my lands, and how also I had chosen to deal with certain treacherous nobles, some of which had been involved in my father's death. There were no religious signs, symbols, or statues in the chapel, all such icons having been removed from it a long time ago. I explained the meaning of all these things to Judith, who merely said: “If the truth be heresy, then I too am a heretic... because I stand by your reasoning, my husband. This does not vilify you in my eyes, fear not!” We then decided that it was time to go to the forbidden tower, and I led Judith to where that could be accessed, bidding her to open its' locked door. Again, she did as I had directed and within the tower we climbed a winding set of stairs that led up into a room near the tower's top. A room that I had forbidden since the death of Luna. For within it was the space in which she and I practiced the arts of alchemy and sorcery. A pentagram was etched upon the floor in white chalk, while various tables set up in the room... contained the myriad types of equipment used by the alchemists of that period in their various experiments. There were bookshelves that held occult tomes that were forbidden by the Church, as well as texts pertaining to the beliefs, rites, and traditions of the Gnostics and the Cathars. Some had been the property of the infamous previous lord of the castle, Gilles de Rais. There was a human skull upon one of the bookshelves, and the horned skull of a goat lay upon a certain table that was off to one side. I explained the meaning and purpose of all that the room contained, to Judith. She was calm even in the face of this forbidden knowledge, and admitted: “It is like what I told you in the Chapel... I have faith in you, and in the understanding that you have good reasons for all that you believe, spiritually. I never had any great love for the Church, myself. I know they hide much from the people. Much that is true, that they would prefer be called false. These books here, had I the ability to read, would I think be more precious to me than any supposedly holy bible.” She was a strong, and wise, girl indeed! I chose well, in choosing her to be my wife and companion. Now, all that remained, was to show her the four chambers in which the remains of my previous wives reposed in eternal slumber. I had been dreading this more than all else, for it meant having to gaze upon them once again. To see what time had robbed them of. To feel the grief of their passing, all over again! I wished I could have given them a decent sort of burial, but because we had fallen away from the Church... we were forbidden such healthier customs.
The reincarnation of my first wife, Maria... perished when she was only sixteen years old. I had never counted her among my wives officially, because she meant more to me than any wife could have. I saw her as a living goddess, as a representation of all that I thought was beautiful and perfect in the world. She was my soul's very mate, something that now Judith was fast becoming. My final memory of her, even in death, was perfect. I had no wish to look upon her corpse! I simply gave Judith the permission to open the door to her crypt, and waiting outside... tears streaming in my eyes, as I heard Judith gasp. Near where I stood, to the right of the door, I had placed a basket that I kept filled with white lilies. It appeared that the current batch was beginning to fade and wither with age. Judith walked back out of the room, shutting and locking the door once again as she did so. “That was Maria.” I told her, and she said to me: “That poor girl! I feel so sorry for her... I will not tell you what made me gasp so, only that time... has begun to claim, her former beauty. It is good you did not come inside with me.” I had never believed that so young a lady could be so strong of will and heart, and of stomach too... yet Judith was not like others I had known in the past. She was an old soul, I realized! Older than any other I had ever known, despite all her seeming youthfulness. Next, I took her to see Iohanna, and again I waited while she entered the burial chamber. Outside, was a table on which I had set a golden goblet, a tribute to the nobility that Iohanna had possessed as my adopted sister. Judith did not gasp this time, but when she so emerged from that place of death, closing and locking the door once more, she asked of me: “What was that strange golden sphere, she was holding in... her hands?” I told the girl: “As a child... she once had a ball, which was her favorite toy. It was a simple yellow ball, nothing fancy. To remind her of it, I bought a new one for her at the marketplace and had it plated in gold. She loved it so much... that I wanted her to have to, to be able to hold it, forever. I am happy that it is with her still!” I was crying as I said this to Judith. Each trip to these chambers was tearing at my heart, and my reason, more and more. Old grief... and the ghosts of those who were more than family to me... was all causing me to feel sharp and rather crushing pains in my chest. I grasped my chest, my heart beating strangely. “Are you alright, my love!” Judith exclaimed. I held up my hand and said: “I will be alright... fear not! Let us just... get the rest of this over with. The memory of these deaths... I fear it is all more than I can bear.” We agreed to make it brief, and that I should continue to remain outside of each door. Next we came to where Luna was laid to rest, and outside of that door I had placed a statue of the ancient goddess Diana, who had been Luna's patron goddess. I waited there by the statue while Judith ventured within the crypt. This time, she had screamed and run out of the room quickly, locking the door securely as she did so. Judith explained to me the reason why she had cried out so, saying: “It was the state of the body is all... it seems that death had been more unkind to her than to the others, and it shocked me. It honestly, truly shocked me! Let us get to the last door, before I lose heart... and decide not to do so.” In a dark state of mind, we made our way to the part of the keep that I had forbidden any and all access to, the place where Carina's room so remained, undisturbed since the night she perished from the illness, and the fever, that claimed her life. Of all my wives, alone it was that her death was the only one which could not have been prevented had I known it was coming. And so for me, it was the most tragic of them all! She had been the very last of my wives to comfort me when I still mourned for the others, and she had been the last person other than the servants, to have known them in life. In my maddest moments following Carina's death, I had come to her room and unlocked it, to lie next to her remains... imagining, that she still lived, was still warm. I held her, and oft fell into slumber at her side. I had no desire to ever do so again, nor to be reminded of such morbid things. And thus it was, that I waited outside of the old room, standing there next to a table on which I had set a vase filled with roses. Judith, neither screamed nor gasped this time. But I did hear her begin to weep, and the sound of her grief made me realize... that she was a very empathetic, sort of person. She knew, how deeply Carina's death had traumatized me, and I had told her of how I had slept next to the corpse when I could bear her loss no longer. But seeing the dead woman was another matter.
I turned, to look into the room, and saw all the tattered, faded draperies. The tapestries that hung from the walls in such a state that nothing could be made of what they once depicted. The weathered state the furniture was in, and how abandoned everything appeared. And there, lying in state upon a magnificent bed fit for a princess, or a queen, was all that remained of Carina. Still wearing the fancy red gown that she had on, upon the night of her passing... her long silky, straight blonde hair appearing untouched by time, though the same could not be said of her once-beautiful face. I cannot speak of it... I cannot write of it even... even seeing it at that time, was more than I could bear. Though I weathered that horror, all the same! Judith had in her hands the flower that I had placed in Carina's... the night she died. A faded, withered red rose that was falling apart even as Judith held it. Crying horrendously, as she did so! She noticed me standing there... and motioned for me to stand back. Then she said, her lips quivering with the grief that was upon her: “Oh heavens! You really did love her very much. More than the others, if I were any judge of such things. Please... just give me a moment, and then I will be along. Do not linger here, husband! My love. This is no fit place for one whose heart is already pained with so much grief.” I had not told her about the physical pains in my heart, but I knew that somehow she could sense all of it. I realized, at that point, that the castle's rooms had begun to deteriorate long before my wives perished. We had neglected so much, been oblivious to so much! The state of Carina's room made me notice this. Upon locking it up one final time, we got about the business of moving on... although a part of me was never truly going to forget so much tragedy. Judith had broken all ties with her village, and devoted all her energy solely to our marriage. The rest of the year passed pleasantly enough, and the servants were glad to see that I was happy again, for happy I was... with my Judith at my side. Soon came the autumn, and then the winter season followed in the autumn's wake. That, was finally when my own death came.
The servants were occupied with their chores, and we were in need of various supplies that had to be purchased from the marketplace. So I went by myself, to see to it, despite how heavily the snow fell on that day. I took ill after that, and the sickness caused my heart to once more act up. This time, I knew all too well that the pain would not just go away! So it was that, as I lay upon the bear skin rug which did decorate the floor before the fireplace in the dining room, I knew that my end was near. Judith doted on me both dutifully and compassionately, caressing my face, kissing me, and telling me not to be afraid. “You will survive this, my love! Think of all that you have already lived through.” she said cheerfully. I confessed to her, however: “It is, precisely all that I have lived through, which now at the end of things is claiming my life. Judith, my beloved... it hurts so much, the pain I am in. My heart! It is killing me. I do not wish to be in so very much pain. Yet... how can I cease it?” It was becoming harder to talk, ever harder and harder the more I tried to. Soon, my vision began to blur. Somewhere... nearby... I could hear the voices of my wives, my brides. Of Maria too! All calling for me. I could not see them, but I sensed their presence. Their spirits had come, to take me into whatever lay beyond this world for whatever sort of souls we had become. I told Judith this as best as I could, even as all was growing dark. She saw the pain in my eyes, heard the agony in my voice, and this was all too much for her to bear. She picked up a sharp kilij sword that hung upon a rack above the mantle of the fireplace, a weapon I had not used in so long, that it almost seemed a part of the past of someone else entirely. Someone I never wanted to be! Its' long, curved blade glinted in the warm light of the hearth's fire, as the young girl raised it very high above her head in both hands. “Be... quick!” I managed to say, knowing her intent was to end my pain. “I love you!” she screamed... and made the cut that separated my head from my body. That was how I actually died, as Vlad Dracula. At the hands of a brave young girl whom I loved, who saw this as an act of mercy. My final thoughts were of her and so it was that my last year of that life was 1486. Naturally, that death was not the end of me, however! I would rise again in future incarnations, else I would not be here to write this now. It would seem that, as in the legends... you cannot keep a good “vampire” down.
The year of 1486 had begun in sorrow for me, with my heart and soul having not fully recovered from the loss of my beloved wives... leaving me trapped in the past, and unable to contemplate a future that I could so much as bear. My name had previously been Vlad Dracula, and perhaps that is still who I was. For the longest time, after falsifying my death in order to begin anew, I had gone by the new name of Radómer Farkas, a name meaning “Happy Wolf”. I was far from happy now, and the irony of having an assumed name such as this one weighed heavily upon me, serving only to increase my depressed state of mind. I was living in the great castle at Tiffauges, in France, having fled my native lands years ago. I was no longer the young idealistic warrior that I once had been, and I found each day difficult to bear. A different sort of man might have sought some diversion or another, by this point. Anything, to keep the darker memories from tormenting one too much. I could not, for the ones I had loved and lost had been to me my entire world, my entire reason for existing. Their smiles, their kindness to me, even all their quirks and eccentricities, had endeared them to my heart so deeply that there was no future for me that they were not a part of. I was haunted by them now, both literally and figuratively. A shell of all I had in the past been... and yet, I kept on living. I ate, if perhaps but little, and I still rode out by horse into the countryside on occasion, sometimes hoping that I might encounter my doom upon such outings. Yet, I always managed to return to the castle safely, my life continuing regardless of my will growing weaker. A young girl came to visit the castle one day, a girl by the name of Judith, who had heard various tales and stories while at her home village, regarding the castle at Tiffauges... and its' mysterious lord. I was that lord, and so it was only polite for me to receive her. Few servants remained, most having left when they saw my mood darkening and my sanity becoming more unhinged. Those who did stay, were of the sort of disposition that made them strong, and able to deal with even the wildest varieties of madness. But the ones who had left, carried certain exaggerated stories with them, and that is how Judith came to learn of the events at the castle to begin with. Events that made her quite concerned. Yet why would any stranger such as herself care? She knew little to nothing about me, and yet here she was, claiming to be in a state of worry and fear. I need to learn more, and thus it was that I ended up meeting the person that would become my final wife prior to my death. The story of which I shall so reveal within these events.
It was the first month of springtime... winter's snows having melted away, bringing with it a fresh sort of warmth to the land. I had been out and about all that day, though I told no one where I had gone and kept to myself the purpose of my outing. As I returned to the castle in the early afternoon, the skies had become cloudy and dreary looking, which darkened my spirits even as I had sought to raise them. After bringing my horse to the stables for the stable girl to take charge of, I went inside the keep and made for the kitchen to see what there was to drink. The former stable boy, had left my service just the previous month, unable to bear any longer the memory of his having witnessed the death of my sister Iohanna... who had also become of my wives prior to her tragic end. Though we had put down the horse that had caused the accident, it did not seem to have been enough to make things better. You cannot, after all, so easily move past such things merely by seeking justice in and of itself. Justice cannot bring breath back to the lungs of the dead, and in my growing insanity I had attempted to do just that on many occasions. To restore life, to the ones I had lost. Always, it ended in failure however, no matter the rituals or spells that I attempted. No matter how much blood I offered the dark old gods! The fire was warm in the old hearth of the castle's keep, although my heart I feared might grow cold ere long. It was then that I was told that I had a visitor, and that is how I came to meet Judith. “Show her in to me.” I said calmly to the servant who had informed me of her arrival. I took a sip of wine in order to steel myself for the meeting that was imminent. I had become somewhat introverted, and was unused to social pleasantries. I would have to pretend to be more used to them, if only so that my visitor might not be too much disconcerted.
The castle itself was an imposing structure! It stood in the center of a great massif of granite rock that extended from Mortagne-sur-Sèvre to Clisson in the Vendée. There were, of course, the dark dungeons, the high gate tower, the mighty curtain walls with their hollow towers, and the hallowed chapel that had not seen use in countless decades, at least not in the traditional sense. In structure, the keep resembled a great towering cube of stone and brick, with semi-cylindrical turrets strengthening its' sides. The only way to reach the keep... was by way of a narrow high gateway, which opened well onto the inside of the guardhouse that was on the first floor of the gate tower at the entrance to the castle itself. As you might well see, one had to be determined indeed, to seek an audience with one who lived in such a location! I could actually understand it when Iohanna had showed up with her companion Luna... back when both yet lived... after all, they had a good reason to seek me out regardless of the difficulty. The castle was in the early stages of disrepair, and beginning to show the signs of its' age. The place was terrible to look upon now, although still pleasant enough on the inside. It was as if the place was rotting along with my will to live, and that it was dying along with me. I could not imagine what might motivate a child such as Judith to come hither. And a child she was, a little girl of only twelve years. Yet she had the heart and spirit of a woman twice her age! The servant ushered her in to where I sat at the great wooden chair that was before the fireplace. She regarded the faded wall tapestries, the elaborately patterned rugs, and the ornate furniture with a slight hint of appreciation. Perhaps she knew something of the history, and of the antiquity, of this place and all that lay within it? She was a pretty child, to be certain... at least to me! I knew, however, that most might not have found her so. She had a chubby, rounded face and a bit of a stocky build to her body. Her lips were plump, her nose broad, and her skin dusky-toned. Her eyes were hazel in color, her red hair long, curly and wild looking. The child wore a long knee-length tunic which was deep blue in color, with gold trim. It was belted at the waist with a lighter blue sash. Beneath the tunic, she wore a pair of baggy looking tan colored trousers and had a pair of brown sandals upon her feet. She carried a walking staff in her hands, and looked quite weary form her travel to the castle. I did not know why, but something about her reminded me of a gypsy girl, and in turn that reminded me of the part of the world that I was forced to leave behind seemingly long ago. She introduced herself to me politely, her voice pleasant to hear: “My lord... I am called Judith... and I hail from a tiny village of not any real import, so I shall not bore you with its' name. You have never been there, and those from there have not had many dealings with you or anyone else from this place. Regardless of that, there are some of my village... who have received former servants that once had been in your employ. They spoke of a great many terrible things, and it seemed that a few were not of sound mind when they spoke thus. As you can guess, I was told to tell you this. None of those are my own words! My mother and father had a mind to come here themselves to talk to you, but I told them I could handle it. That I was old enough to do this for them. What we all want to know in my village is merely this! Are you, sir, in fact the Devil?”
What had those servants told her? Likely that I was cursed, and that my wives had perished merely by having been associated with me. None of the servants knew of my true identity as Vlad Dracula! Yet, I could not help but wonder what lunacy had beset those who left, that they would make such a claim of me. I asked Judith what caused people to think this about me, and she confirmed what I suspected, also adding: “Our next door neighbor's youngest boy even thinks you might have killed your wives with evil spells or some other kind of dark magic. My lord, I know how all of this sounds, and that is why we did not take this to the Church or to the secular authorities. It is merely rumor, not truth. I am here... to learn what the truth actually is.” I nodded my head in understanding, and replied: “Nothing I can simply say, will prove my innocence to you, or to your people. But if you stay with me here for a time, live here in my company for a while, you will see for yourself all that transpires within these walls. I will ask of you nothing, expect nothing from you, and when you feel you have learned all... you may go as you please.”
She appeared agreeable to my suggestion, stating: “I think I could do that well enough, sir! Show me to my room then, and tell me if there are any laws or rules that I will need to follow during my stay.” I thereafter replied: “As I said, I ask nothing of you, and expect nothing from me... only, if you should at all happen to venture into the cellars, in particular our wine cellar, and should you find there certain old doors that are locked. Metal doors, all of them! Do not attempt to open them, nor to ask anyone for the keys by which they could be opened. There is a similar place on an upper floor of the keep here. There is a hallway there, and a certain room at the end of it, which is off limits. The door to that room is just as locked, and the key is not to be asked for. Those keys are four in number, and they are to be found in my possession alone. Three other keys also, are forbidden! The key to the chapel, which is a place we no longer make use of. The key to the dungeons, which are dangerous to enter. And the key to the very tallest of all the castle's towers. That tower has been out of use since last year, and is not safe to walk in due to its' current state. Naturally, all seven of those doors are locked securely, and thus you should not have any problems with leaving them as such. I merely wish to make you aware of the reason why this is so.” With that out of the way, the little girl smiled and I showed her to the guest room myself. I was beginning to mistrust my servants now, and thought it best to conduct all dealings with Judith without them being involved. “What is your name, my lord?” she asked me as she laid down on the bed in the guest room in order to relax and rest for a few hours. Before leaving the room, I responded: “My name is Radómer Farkas, and I am originally from Hungary. I came here primarily at the insistence of my late wife Carina, whose kin it was that considered this place to be their home. Now my home, to which I do bid you the warmest of welcomes! Now rest for a bit, if you must, and seek me if you have a mind to.” I left her to her relaxation and tried to mentally prepare myself for another intolerably lonely evening. On seeing that girl, I felt the stirrings of old desires beginning within me again. I would later take a whip to my back and attempt to lash such thoughts out of me, but even a thousand pains would not erase them.
Later that night... I found myself unable to sleep, tormented by night terrors so awful that I believed I was beset by demons out of Hell itself. I went out that night into the countryside in order to lose myself in the night air, and felt intoxicated by the glistening stars and the brilliance of the moon high above the land. I ventured into a stretch of woods, and thereafter came to a small cottage. The wind was howling, and I was almost frightened by the sound that it was making that night. I would, perhaps, have felt a bit stronger... had I not otherwise been alone. I detested loneliness, and the dread that it always managed to fill me with! There were the sounds of animals scattering in the underbrush, as I walked up the cottage. There was candlelight coming from one of the windows, and inside I could see a beautiful women who sat by a fireplace reading from a small scroll. It was rare to find peasants who could read at all, and the woman was indeed a peasant by the style of her dress. I wondered if she might have been a witch... for many witches I had known were quite highly literate. She looked lovely in the warm light! She wore a long gray skirt which was rather frilly near the bottom... and a white low cut blouse, with wide sleeves. Over the blouse she wore a gray bodice that was at present unlaced for comfort. She had luxurious curly red hair that reminded me of Judith's, and in her hair she wore several scarlet colored ribbons. Scarlet upon red flame, I thought to myself! She had a bit of a curvy build to her, and rather pleasing features. She had a healthy tone to her skin, and a ready smile as she noticed me regarding her. Despite her smile she appeared startled, and covered her chest with a nearby blanket. “What are you doing here, sir?” she inquired of me. “Are you from one of the villages, or do you hail from the castle?” she added. I told her that I indeed hailed from the castle, over which I was the lord thereof. “My lord... I am your most loyal subject.” she said, closing her eyes and nodding her head politely. My attire was that of a nobleman and so the woman took me at my word. I inquired of her: “Where is your husband, good lady? Or do you in fact live alone here!” to which she replied: “I am married, sir. My husband... is a woodcutter, by trade.”
It was then, that the man came home and saw me standing there outside, talking with his wife through the cottage window. He set his ax down upon noticing how I was dressed, and greeted me warmly. “My lord, welcome to our house! What can we do for you, at this late hour?” I said unto him kindly: “Good sir, your wife is a most charming lady, and it appears quite intelligent as well. She is also an angel to so look upon, and I hope that I did not do any discourtesy by staring at her as I might have been. I am from the castle, as I informed her, and am the lord thereof.” the woodcutter was a skinny looking man, and I thought he appeared ill-suited for his chosen profession. He responded to me, so saying: “You do her no discourtesy by speaking as you do, my lord! She and I, were wed just this past week, and moved out to her cottage here... to start our lives right and proper.” I asked him why they had not come to ask me for my blessing on their union, to which he curiously stated: “That is an old custom, my lord! The one who ruled here of old imposed it on occasion they say, but we are... you must forgive us... unused to the old customs.” I reminded him of another custom then, saying that as recompense for their ignorance of my wish to bless their wedding, I expected to be allowed to lie with his wife on a night of my choosing. I stated in closing: “Look at it as a compliment... to your fine choice in a wife!” the man's lower lip was quivering, his hands shaking with fear. He averted my gaze and said: “Oh please my lord! Do not insist on this... it is within your right, certainly, as the lord of this land. But it will dishonor our marriage, and cause my wife to break faith with God, before whom she was sworn to me.” I than informed the man of how I had witnessed his wife reading from that scroll she still clutched. “Some might think it above her station to be so learned. If you wish no one to learn of this, then you will allow me my night of pleasure with your wife.” that was the threat I employed. The man replied: “If word got out... she is a follower of the old ways, sir. A heretic, by the Church's standards. Yet, I love her all the same!” I assured him, that no word ever would. He turned to walk away then, muttering: “I will go back out into the woods for the remainder of the night, sir. If it will still your tongue, then do whatever you like. Just, do not expect me to stay and watch.” I intended for it be that night in any case, and once the man went back into the dark of the forest, I entered the cottage, and regarded his wife with lust in my eyes. She sat upon her chair... her eyes wide with terror as she clutched the blanket over her body. I tore the scroll out of her hands and then the blanket from her grasp. She was not a strong woman by any stretch of the imagination. “Please my lord! Do not do this, I beg of you.” she pleased, yet I remained firm in my resolve. “You will be the means by which I will keep my nightmares at bay this evening.” I informed her, and dragged from from the chair, throwing her unto the crude straw bed that lay across the room. I tore away her bodice, ripped the front of her blouse open, revealing her ample bosom, and forced her legs open. She did not resist.... yet even so, I was perhaps a bit rough with her. I pulled her skirts up to her waist, then proceeded quite cruelly to have my way with her. All the time, imagining that it was really Judith whom I coupled with.
I fell asleep in that woman's arms that night... and made my way back to the castle at first light. I had no nightmares, yet I realized that in the heat of my lust I never even learned the woman's name. Had I become such a beast, in my grief? I wondered. That was the day when Judith wished for me to show her around the castle. She was dressed mostly similar to the sort of attire she had on the day before, having thus brought with her a few changes of clothing. Only, this time... she wore a forest green tunic with no trim, and a pair of baggy white trousers tucked into a pair of brown ankle boots. I was reminded, of my first wife... Maria... who always loved to wear clothing that was forest green in color, along with other shades of green as well. This enamored me even more deeply with my young guest. I took her through all of the rooms, chambers, and halls of the castle that were not locked. I explained each of them to her and showed her that indeed there was nothing peculiar going on in my home. I ended the tour at last, in the castle library, where I showed her my collection of various old books, scrolls, and parchments. She could not read, I then discovered, but was impressed with the collection regardless of that shortcoming.
“It is magnificent!” the girl remarked, seemingly astonished. She then inquired as to where I was the previous night, and I told her that I was out hunting. In a way, this was not a lie. Judith was displeased, it seemed, by something and I thought it prudent to ask her what bothered her so much. She then told me, in a somewhat nervous manner: “My lord... I know I should not be asking this of you, since you did tell me it was forbidden! But, could I just once learn what lies behind the seven locked doors? After that I am certain that I could honestly tell my people that... indeed... they have nothing to fear, and that all is well with the castle and its' lord.” I cautioned her not to ask this of me, and explained: “There are things behind those doors, that no child should see.” to which she said defiantly: “I am not afraid! And I am a lot less of a child, than you think me to be. In my twelve years of life... I have seen things that would in truth drive some grown women mad. I have seen death, and worse than death.” She had tears streaming down her cheeks as she confided that in me. She was far too mature for one so young! I dried her tears and said to her: “Now there, there! Do not cry, girl. I have seen much, as well. I will tell you what... if, after remaining here with me for the next three months, you have proven to me that you are indeed of a strong stomach and even stronger will, then I will myself unlock each of the locked doors, and so allow you to behold their grim secrets. For they are grim indeed! Is that agreeable to you?” She nodded, and told me that it was. I then, on a sudden impulse, kissed her cheek and caressed her hair. She blushed a bit, and her breath quickened. Yet, she did not seem to mind this attention! I was glad. Over those next three months, we grew closer and closer as I found myself sharing with Judith more and more about not only the castle and its' history, as much as I myself had learned of it, but also regarding my own past. It been long since I had felt I could open up to another living soul, yet this girl was so easy to speak with!
By the time that the three months had passed, I had already confided in the girl about my true identity, and she thankfully had never heard of Vlad Dracula before, so she was not judgmental upon this reveal. She knew mostly all of the events of my life by that point... all the worst things that I had done, as well as all of the best. I left out only the vile act I had committed upon the woodcutter's wife, since it pained me to think of having done such a thing, despite that the law of the land said I had the right to. Had she known I had done it because the woman reminded me of her, I suspected she would have found it even more perverse. Upon learning of the losses I had suffered in life, in particular the loss of Maria, and the other women I had come to love so deeply... Judith confessed unto me that she wished that she had the power to bring joy and happiness back to my heart. “You have suffered more than one lifetime's worth of pain, my lord Dracula...” she told me one evening, as we sat together in the living area after supper. She added: “I would truly give all that I am, if I thought that I could turn your sad, perpetual frown into a bright and contented smile.” We were mutually falling in love, I sensed. I said unto her: “I shall never ask you for all that you are, but if I could... I would ask, for your hand in marriage. You are different, in so many ways, from others I have known! You have a sorrow in your heart that calls to mine, and I also would... had I the power to do so... ease that pain that you never speak to me about. Perhaps together... as man and wife... we might bring peace to each other's hearts, at last!” She blushed more than I had at all seen her do previously, and was at a loss for words. She then spoke, her voice filled with a tone that told me how surprised she was at what I was offering her: “Oh my lord... Vlad!... I would be delighted to become your wife. I am considered... undesirable... for marriage back in my village in any case. All because of that pain I find it so hard to speak of. But since we are to be wed it seems, I feel that I have to confide in you why it is that I perhaps seem so mature for my age.” She then told me her secret, and it was terrible indeed. Her father had raped her when she was only ten years old, and because she was no longer a virgin, she was deemed unsuitable for marriage. The act was blamed upon her brother, who was imprisoned for the incestuous crime. Her innocence stolen at so young an age, her mind snapped... and she became gloomy, and began to act more like a grown woman than the child she had once been.
“It was not my ravishment that matured me mentally, but how I attempted to cope with the memories of it. My father, was not a gentle man... and he harmed my body a great deal, by what he did with me.” That was the revelation that made me see Judith in a whole new light. I was now determined to be all that she desired in life, and more. We held a private ceremony, just outside the castle's chapel. Not one of the villagers were invited, nor anyone of the girl's family. Although word was sent to them, to inform them of our decision to wed. A generous amount of money was paid to her parents, so that they would see this as a beneficial union for them as well. However, I had other plans in mind, for Judith's odious father! Yet, those would have to wait until after the wedding. Judith wore a very beautiful flowing white gown for the occasion, with a crown of white flowers in her ever wild looking, curly red hair. A silver sash belt was tied around her waist, and silver colored dress shoes were upon her feet. She was a vision of such loveliness, that I gasped when I beheld her on that day. I cannot the recall the day exactly, nor the month... time had no meaning for me any longer by that point. I only remember that it was a warm and pleasant day outside, when the ceremony binding us together was held. When I kissed her with all the passion in my heart, and embraced her with all the intensity that I had longed desired to share with her... it was the first time I had been truly happy since long before the deaths of my previous wives. Our night together was passionate, intense, and yet still I was mindful of her young age and made certain to do things in such a way that she was comfortable with the pleasures we enjoyed. Indeed, she spoke true to me, she was no virgin... but I did not mind that. Had she been a harlot, I would have loved her all the same! I did not judge the worth of a girl in the same way that other men did. The worth of her soul was enough for me, and I found that to be quite priceless. At the climax of our lovemaking, I almost felt as if our souls had become one. I gazed into her soft, hazel eyes, and I whispered to her: “I love you, oh so very much, my Judith! I am yours, even beyond this life's ending.” and I knew that Maria would not at all have minded this. I spoke in truth to Judith, and found... that perhaps I could forget the past entirely.
Five days after our wedding night... I had Judith's father brought to the castle, where I made the child face her father with what he had done to her. At first, he denied the deed entirely, but he was a poor liar and eventually slipped with his words, telling the girl wickedly that it would have been better, for him, had she been born mute so that what passed between them might never be known. I then said unto him: “What exactly did pass between you, that requires such silence?” and he at last admitted to the act. He claimed that he had been drunk at the time, and that it had been the drink that made him do it. Now, at last, I had the legal right to punish him for having harmed his daughter. I said to Judith: “I promised you that had you proved able to bear it, I would show you fully what lies behind the seven locked doors. Let us go down to the dungeons now! The servants, shall bring your father along with us.” The servants did come and restrain the wicked man with shackles, and so they bore him on down to the dungeons, which I unlocked for the first time in seemingly forever. I advised Judith to remain outside the door if she was at all squeamish, but she insisted bravely: “No, my love! I will not wait outside... I want to see that my father is punished, with my own eyes. I want to look in his eyes and know that he suffers... just as he so looked into mine, when he made me suffer.” The man was fat, and as disgusting to look upon as he had acted. I ordered him chained to the wall of a cell in the dungeons, and had the servants bring forth the instruments of torture, which I showed to him, explaining all that I was about to do in gruesome detail. It had the effect of causing the man to urinate out of fear. Judith said calmly to me: “Let us begin... my love!” and she made the first cut into her father's flesh, quite on her own initiative. I was impressed at the very sheer precision of her skill with the implement. “That was for my stolen virtue!” she screamed, spitting up into his face as she walked away. I had never seen her angry before, and her fury was almost beautiful to behold. I then proceeded to slowly flay the man alive, also castrating him in such a way that his penis was removed as well as his testicles. He shrieked, cried, and whimpered pitifully before dying.
The man's remains were nailed to the door of the family's cottage, with a note nailed unto the bloody, skinless corpse stating what his crime had been, and that now such crimes would be punishable only by death, for so long as I was lord of that castle and those lands. The man's flesh was fed to wild pigs, and the pigs were slaughtered. The meat of the pigs was then given to Judith's mother, and she was ordered to eat of it in punishment for having kept her husband's crime a secret, and for having allowed one who was innocent to be blamed for it. I was severe when it came to justice! And that is why people feared in those days to displease me. Judith's brother had died in prison, and so with this act... two evils had been avenged. Once we had spent a good week putting the memory of those events out of our minds, Judith asked me if I might be willing to share with her the secrets that lay behind the six remaining doors. I agreed that now it was time to, that she was indeed strong enough to bear the knowledge. We decided, that first it should be the chapel that we went to. I gave the key ring to my young wife, and when we so reached the chapel's doors I bade her unlock them. She did as instructed, and we entered that forsaken place. The altar had been desecrated by Luna and I back when she yet lived. We had decided that all the ways of the Church were corrupt and wicked, and so in honor of the ancient ways we truly followed... we had performed animal sacrifices upon the Church's altar, and used the blood to paint upon it every sort of arcane, mystical diagram, symbol and seal that we knew of. It was heresy, and we did not care! The previous religious tapestries had been torn down, and in their place I had new tapestries created... these, bearing upon them scenes depicting seeming forests of tall wooden stakes upon which Turkish soldiers were impaled. Some also depicted scenes of wretched looking nobles attempting to build the foundations of a castle with their bare hands. Things that referred to events from my time as the Prince of Wallachia. How I had dealt with the Turks that were invading my lands, and how also I had chosen to deal with certain treacherous nobles, some of which had been involved in my father's death. There were no religious signs, symbols, or statues in the chapel, all such icons having been removed from it a long time ago. I explained the meaning of all these things to Judith, who merely said: “If the truth be heresy, then I too am a heretic... because I stand by your reasoning, my husband. This does not vilify you in my eyes, fear not!” We then decided that it was time to go to the forbidden tower, and I led Judith to where that could be accessed, bidding her to open its' locked door. Again, she did as I had directed and within the tower we climbed a winding set of stairs that led up into a room near the tower's top. A room that I had forbidden since the death of Luna. For within it was the space in which she and I practiced the arts of alchemy and sorcery. A pentagram was etched upon the floor in white chalk, while various tables set up in the room... contained the myriad types of equipment used by the alchemists of that period in their various experiments. There were bookshelves that held occult tomes that were forbidden by the Church, as well as texts pertaining to the beliefs, rites, and traditions of the Gnostics and the Cathars. Some had been the property of the infamous previous lord of the castle, Gilles de Rais. There was a human skull upon one of the bookshelves, and the horned skull of a goat lay upon a certain table that was off to one side. I explained the meaning and purpose of all that the room contained, to Judith. She was calm even in the face of this forbidden knowledge, and admitted: “It is like what I told you in the Chapel... I have faith in you, and in the understanding that you have good reasons for all that you believe, spiritually. I never had any great love for the Church, myself. I know they hide much from the people. Much that is true, that they would prefer be called false. These books here, had I the ability to read, would I think be more precious to me than any supposedly holy bible.” She was a strong, and wise, girl indeed! I chose well, in choosing her to be my wife and companion. Now, all that remained, was to show her the four chambers in which the remains of my previous wives reposed in eternal slumber. I had been dreading this more than all else, for it meant having to gaze upon them once again. To see what time had robbed them of. To feel the grief of their passing, all over again! I wished I could have given them a decent sort of burial, but because we had fallen away from the Church... we were forbidden such healthier customs.
The reincarnation of my first wife, Maria... perished when she was only sixteen years old. I had never counted her among my wives officially, because she meant more to me than any wife could have. I saw her as a living goddess, as a representation of all that I thought was beautiful and perfect in the world. She was my soul's very mate, something that now Judith was fast becoming. My final memory of her, even in death, was perfect. I had no wish to look upon her corpse! I simply gave Judith the permission to open the door to her crypt, and waiting outside... tears streaming in my eyes, as I heard Judith gasp. Near where I stood, to the right of the door, I had placed a basket that I kept filled with white lilies. It appeared that the current batch was beginning to fade and wither with age. Judith walked back out of the room, shutting and locking the door once again as she did so. “That was Maria.” I told her, and she said to me: “That poor girl! I feel so sorry for her... I will not tell you what made me gasp so, only that time... has begun to claim, her former beauty. It is good you did not come inside with me.” I had never believed that so young a lady could be so strong of will and heart, and of stomach too... yet Judith was not like others I had known in the past. She was an old soul, I realized! Older than any other I had ever known, despite all her seeming youthfulness. Next, I took her to see Iohanna, and again I waited while she entered the burial chamber. Outside, was a table on which I had set a golden goblet, a tribute to the nobility that Iohanna had possessed as my adopted sister. Judith did not gasp this time, but when she so emerged from that place of death, closing and locking the door once more, she asked of me: “What was that strange golden sphere, she was holding in... her hands?” I told the girl: “As a child... she once had a ball, which was her favorite toy. It was a simple yellow ball, nothing fancy. To remind her of it, I bought a new one for her at the marketplace and had it plated in gold. She loved it so much... that I wanted her to have to, to be able to hold it, forever. I am happy that it is with her still!” I was crying as I said this to Judith. Each trip to these chambers was tearing at my heart, and my reason, more and more. Old grief... and the ghosts of those who were more than family to me... was all causing me to feel sharp and rather crushing pains in my chest. I grasped my chest, my heart beating strangely. “Are you alright, my love!” Judith exclaimed. I held up my hand and said: “I will be alright... fear not! Let us just... get the rest of this over with. The memory of these deaths... I fear it is all more than I can bear.” We agreed to make it brief, and that I should continue to remain outside of each door. Next we came to where Luna was laid to rest, and outside of that door I had placed a statue of the ancient goddess Diana, who had been Luna's patron goddess. I waited there by the statue while Judith ventured within the crypt. This time, she had screamed and run out of the room quickly, locking the door securely as she did so. Judith explained to me the reason why she had cried out so, saying: “It was the state of the body is all... it seems that death had been more unkind to her than to the others, and it shocked me. It honestly, truly shocked me! Let us get to the last door, before I lose heart... and decide not to do so.” In a dark state of mind, we made our way to the part of the keep that I had forbidden any and all access to, the place where Carina's room so remained, undisturbed since the night she perished from the illness, and the fever, that claimed her life. Of all my wives, alone it was that her death was the only one which could not have been prevented had I known it was coming. And so for me, it was the most tragic of them all! She had been the very last of my wives to comfort me when I still mourned for the others, and she had been the last person other than the servants, to have known them in life. In my maddest moments following Carina's death, I had come to her room and unlocked it, to lie next to her remains... imagining, that she still lived, was still warm. I held her, and oft fell into slumber at her side. I had no desire to ever do so again, nor to be reminded of such morbid things. And thus it was, that I waited outside of the old room, standing there next to a table on which I had set a vase filled with roses. Judith, neither screamed nor gasped this time. But I did hear her begin to weep, and the sound of her grief made me realize... that she was a very empathetic, sort of person. She knew, how deeply Carina's death had traumatized me, and I had told her of how I had slept next to the corpse when I could bear her loss no longer. But seeing the dead woman was another matter.
I turned, to look into the room, and saw all the tattered, faded draperies. The tapestries that hung from the walls in such a state that nothing could be made of what they once depicted. The weathered state the furniture was in, and how abandoned everything appeared. And there, lying in state upon a magnificent bed fit for a princess, or a queen, was all that remained of Carina. Still wearing the fancy red gown that she had on, upon the night of her passing... her long silky, straight blonde hair appearing untouched by time, though the same could not be said of her once-beautiful face. I cannot speak of it... I cannot write of it even... even seeing it at that time, was more than I could bear. Though I weathered that horror, all the same! Judith had in her hands the flower that I had placed in Carina's... the night she died. A faded, withered red rose that was falling apart even as Judith held it. Crying horrendously, as she did so! She noticed me standing there... and motioned for me to stand back. Then she said, her lips quivering with the grief that was upon her: “Oh heavens! You really did love her very much. More than the others, if I were any judge of such things. Please... just give me a moment, and then I will be along. Do not linger here, husband! My love. This is no fit place for one whose heart is already pained with so much grief.” I had not told her about the physical pains in my heart, but I knew that somehow she could sense all of it. I realized, at that point, that the castle's rooms had begun to deteriorate long before my wives perished. We had neglected so much, been oblivious to so much! The state of Carina's room made me notice this. Upon locking it up one final time, we got about the business of moving on... although a part of me was never truly going to forget so much tragedy. Judith had broken all ties with her village, and devoted all her energy solely to our marriage. The rest of the year passed pleasantly enough, and the servants were glad to see that I was happy again, for happy I was... with my Judith at my side. Soon came the autumn, and then the winter season followed in the autumn's wake. That, was finally when my own death came.
The servants were occupied with their chores, and we were in need of various supplies that had to be purchased from the marketplace. So I went by myself, to see to it, despite how heavily the snow fell on that day. I took ill after that, and the sickness caused my heart to once more act up. This time, I knew all too well that the pain would not just go away! So it was that, as I lay upon the bear skin rug which did decorate the floor before the fireplace in the dining room, I knew that my end was near. Judith doted on me both dutifully and compassionately, caressing my face, kissing me, and telling me not to be afraid. “You will survive this, my love! Think of all that you have already lived through.” she said cheerfully. I confessed to her, however: “It is, precisely all that I have lived through, which now at the end of things is claiming my life. Judith, my beloved... it hurts so much, the pain I am in. My heart! It is killing me. I do not wish to be in so very much pain. Yet... how can I cease it?” It was becoming harder to talk, ever harder and harder the more I tried to. Soon, my vision began to blur. Somewhere... nearby... I could hear the voices of my wives, my brides. Of Maria too! All calling for me. I could not see them, but I sensed their presence. Their spirits had come, to take me into whatever lay beyond this world for whatever sort of souls we had become. I told Judith this as best as I could, even as all was growing dark. She saw the pain in my eyes, heard the agony in my voice, and this was all too much for her to bear. She picked up a sharp kilij sword that hung upon a rack above the mantle of the fireplace, a weapon I had not used in so long, that it almost seemed a part of the past of someone else entirely. Someone I never wanted to be! Its' long, curved blade glinted in the warm light of the hearth's fire, as the young girl raised it very high above her head in both hands. “Be... quick!” I managed to say, knowing her intent was to end my pain. “I love you!” she screamed... and made the cut that separated my head from my body. That was how I actually died, as Vlad Dracula. At the hands of a brave young girl whom I loved, who saw this as an act of mercy. My final thoughts were of her and so it was that my last year of that life was 1486. Naturally, that death was not the end of me, however! I would rise again in future incarnations, else I would not be here to write this now. It would seem that, as in the legends... you cannot keep a good “vampire” down.
Published 24th Jun 2022
Author's Note
This two-part work is based upon some of my past-life memories.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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People think about Vlad Dracula, about Vlad the Impaler, and they always are picturing this cruel, very stern man who was capable of doing terrible things. They forget how over in Romania Vlad Dracula is national hero to this day! I used to know a girl from there, and she grew up hearing heroic tales of the great deeds done by Vlad Dracula. I know you Kara in real life, and I knew you back when you were Vlad Dracula as well, when I was that one wife of yours, Luna. Yes, back then, some of the things we both did maybe today by modern standards many would call evil! But no worse I believe than many nobles from that time. Better than many I could name! At least no matter what else anyone could say, you were always honest about things. I mean, people always knew where they stood with you. You the same today. And that, commands much respect! And from me, it commands love also. One interesting fact is that legends about your time as the lord of that castle in France, combined with stories about Gilles de Rais, were the origin of the legend of Bluebeard. I wonder if paintings of Judith beheading Holofernes were not a secret way of telling what really happen to Vlad Dracula with only certain people knowing in secret. Like, the paintings having a double meaning, with that being one of the meanings. Me, I always thought so! Ever since you told me all the details of your final days with Judith up until she cut off your head. Given your last wife's name was Judith after all, it only makes logic and sense. Also, interesting thing is how both Gilles de Rais and yourself were demonized by people and called monsters while actually being far from it. Then again, you both had no use for the Church towards the end of your lives, and both had an interest in things the Church called people heretics for. Sad how back then this led to people being demonized, and sometimes like in the case of Gilles de Rais being killed for it. Joan of Arc they tried to do that to also, only to change their minds later! But yes, you were... and still are... a very complex person, with many facets. Good, evil, light, dark, and all in between! And for all that you are, I love you no matter what.
25th Jun 2022 3:39am
You speak a great deal of truth in your comment here, beloved! My Camilla... my Luna. I too knew a woman from Romania years ago, she was a most delightful young lady, if a tad bit eccentric in some ways. In hindsight, it is no wonder she and I were such good friends! She used to tell me all kinds of stories about the person I used to be in Romania of old, and of how as Vlad Dracula they still do regard me in a positive light even now. Hearing that always delights me, since I know I left the right sort of legacy behind me in that life, after all. I try not to think too deeply in regard to if I was perhaps good or evil when I did this or that back then. I was, more than aught else, a product of the times and of my upbringing, though I taught myself a great deal in order to rise above such things as best as I was able to. Interestingly, in this current life of mine I had to do much the same! That is to teach myself a better way than I had been raised with or taught. Back then, I was sold into bondage to the Turks during my childhood. In this current life, I suffered a similar type of bondage when I was only twelve years old. Only, instead of the Turks I was forced into a very traumatic military program that messed me up for the better part of my teen years. In both lives, those who sought to break my spirit could not, discovering just how strong of a will it is that I possess. You are one hundred percent correct about how the legend of Bluebeard originated, and you are also correct regarding your beliefs about the Judith beheading Holofernes paintings. At the very least, some of them did contain that hidden double meaning. A lot of renaissance era artwork contained hidden secrets, some right there to be seen in plain sight, but only for those initiated into the knowledge required to see them. Today, we see a lot of symbolism in movies and music videos, and it is kind of along similar lines. Not everyone will notice it, but once you do, you cannot help but see it. I know a great deal about Gilles de Rais, actually, and Joan of Arc. I had always thought that there was some small measure of rather dark irony, that I ended up dying in the very same castle he used to be the lord over, and so much of my own legend ended up being bound together with his own. But certain threads of fate can run so close on the greater tapestry of things, that it is inevitable for them to become bound together in various ways. It is a truth, that we who were called heretics in the old days, today are amongst the most revolutionary when it comes to thinking. Anyone can be a sheep and follow after the Church blindly, never questioning and not growing! But the true individual is made brilliant by questioning, by choosing not to be a sheep, and to follow only the dictates of their own heart. You and I, Cami, we are both true individuals. As was Gilles de Rais and Joan of Arc in their time. I love you as well, Cami! All that you are and all that you were, and all that you can ever be. That is ever the beauty of a love that is eternal! And mine is always just such a love. :)
