Choking

Dear A,

How in heavens name did he think it was a blow job? Hmmm. Well, maybe…😉
“Life” can choke the “life” out of you. This had me remembering someone who was as suffocating as this. In the metaphorical sense I let him put a choke hold on me until I realized I’m worthy of something better. And that’s when the squeeze was me throttling his neck instead. (All figuratively of course, but there were times😡) I think this is such a great poem defining that feeling of stifling harshness. H🌷

Hi Honoria!!

Yes!! Life can run you over like a freight train. Not even saying excuse me or watch out - coming through. A family member of mine lost her two boys and her husband within a two year span. All due to heart attacks. Sometimes you just say what the fuck!! So unprepared for such life changing moments.
Sometimes relationships can also be suffocating. I've never been in an physical abusive relationship but at times we do need our space. Especially as a writer because it is such an isolating form of art.

My buddy at work is not the poetic type. LOL Dude is hilarious and one of my closest friends.  I like to get other male perspectives beside my husband. Try to reach people who would think poetry isn't their thing and maybe think twice.

Thanks for commenting as always:)

I like this format of writing
I use it myself
Life can and often is a pile up
I didn't see blow job here but they are always worth looking for ...

BIG LIKE

Hi PS!

Thanks for stopping by and commenting.
Life can be that struggle but gotta keep moving.
But it is okay to own an emotion when you feel
like out of control. I write a lot of my ugly down.
It helps with getting it out. Kinda like....dare I say...an exorcism.  LOL

I didn't see the BJ in this either. Totally caught off guard when
he said that. But he's like one of my closes friends so I got to call
him an asshole and we both laughed it off.

Thanks again for commenting!

This is so relatable for me Adelphina. Feeling like the air is gone and needing my space. I am someone who needs alone time so I definitely identify with that. With so many demands it can be so hard. Mother's music is very meaningful to me. My Mom is very sick and I so want to hear that music. I so wish she could be okay. That choking feeling can be so overwhelming.

And I do love the blowjob angle, that is definitely a different read. But I love that. lol

Hi Kristina

I think we all go through some very trying times. How we deal with it is important. To try and take a breather even when there is no air.
Your struggle is inevitable for me as well. Sometimes I look at my mon and know in time I will be in your shoes. Whether in age or illness.
You can always hit my email if you are in a bad place and need to vent.

My mom is a handful!!  
Love her to pieces though.  

Thanks for commenting chica:)

The BJ angle honestly cracked me up when he said it.
I am very difficult to offend.  
I'd rather laugh then be upset. I'm kinda weird that way.

Beautifully rendered.

I believe there are meditative techniques, which
may present the possibility of embedding nature in our minds,
allowing us to access these energies at any time.

But nevertheless...  I definitely relate to this.

I just wrote something that briefly touches upon
my social anxiety, which I have experienced in the past.

(I think I had post traumatic stress?
I chose to go it alone and did not get a diagnosis.)

but yes....  this is wonderful.

Yes. I think in the years to come there will be a lot of undiagnosed post traumatic stress cases out there. Society - depending on where you live - can be claustrophobic. I'm usually a positive person. Like to look at things like the glass is half full.  
Poetry is where I put a lot of my ugly feelings. Darker stuff.  
And as long as we have a positive outlet - like poetry - we are not alone my dear fellow poet:)

Thanks for commenting!!!

Interesting conflation of environmental issue--clean air, nature--with a healthy relationship, from the opposite:  pollution becomes controlling, suffocating behavior.
Hmm...
The question for this reader:
Is the speaker overlaying eco-overtones onto an abusive relationship; or an abusive relationship onto her dependence and assimilating to an un-sustainable, environmentally hazardous, chemically-saturated dystopia?
The latter direction more directly implicates her in her own plight--
Therefore a richer, more fertile ground for digging.
Enjoyed!

Hi Mark!!

So glad you stopped by. This can be related to so many issues. I'm going to be honest. When I first started playing with this poem I was also going to include motherhood in a couple of stanzas. With my first born mother instinct kicked in but at times it just took over everything. I was so tired all the time. No sleep. Zombie mom. LOL  I love my boys. I did spoil them with kisses and attention but there were times I could not wait for grandma to swoop in and give me some space.

Thanks for commenting!!!

I loved KristinaX's comment.
Its very well written?  

"You're too
deep inside
and stupid pride
won't let go
of my throat
fingers tight
out of spite"  
--Very cool pen 🖋️🖋️

Very heavy and artistic. Love it ❤️

Hey Rainy:)

Thanks for reading. This is a poem I wrote around 10 years ago.
Very old but it can still translate into modern time.
Thanks for your RL!!!!

Hahahah you are funny - $94_6?