Zombabe

 
I’d been depressed for the longest time  
Ever since I lost my one and only babe  
Hoping against hope she’d be mine again  
And come back from beyond the grave  
 
I dropped so many pennies and coins  
In wishing fountains all around the world  
Praying endlessly to the gods and fates  
Begging and pleading to give me back my girl  
 
Then on the last night of October  
I went out to go get some weed candy  
And as I walked by the old cemetery  
Strangers were dancing nifty and dandy  
 
I thought, why are people dressed like Thriller?  
It’s kind of weird they’re acting it out tonight  
Then I noticed one of them was Mr. Miller  
A neighbor who died in a tragic machete fight  
 
Then I recognized everyone on the street  
The dearly departed had come back to life!  
Scared I ran my ass home and sure enough  
When I opened the door there was my wife  
 
She said “haimailowareewewhappeetooseemee”  
I guess her tongue had badly decomposed  
Her skin was icky and green looking mean  
Like She-Hulk but with some bones exposed  
 
I said “hey mamacita whaccha doing tonight”  
All the while I tried to keep my wit and poise  
But I was scared shitless, my babe’s a zombie  
Yet I love the girl so I had no other choice  
 
So she told me all about the underworld  
I told her about my travels and she was envious  
“I was going around making wishes on fountains  
Trying to have you back but now I’m penniless”  
 
Then she asked me that dreaded question  
If I’d been seeing “some other bitch” on the side  
No zombabe, I’ve behaved I swear on your grave  
Then she said “doewewannagitfreakytonigh”  
 
I thought to myself, Fuck it I might as well indulge  
And told her, “I’m happy you’re back and reanimated  
But if this relationship’s gonna work during a pandemic  
Then let’s go get your sexy dead ass vaccinated”