You Didn't Know Me When....

You Didn’t Know Me When…
 
Part I
 
You didn’t know me
When I thought the world of my family
When  we’d hold hands at the circus
                under the tent
Everyone’s eyes bright with delight
in the city
 
You didn’t know me
When I saw lovely things
When I played with ponies with wings
                pastel plastic dreams
Letting my imagination take me away
To a distant faraway place
Just me and my suitcase
               
You didn’t know me
When I didn’t care about mosquitos
When I’d play outside until dark
                until past dark
Building walls around myself
in the dirt
 
You didn’t know me
When I wore pink dresses
When I’d pout and shout about it
                on Sundays
Going to church with lacy socks stuffed
inside scuffed shoes
 
Part II
 
You didn’t know me
When I saw terrible things
When I felt like I was holding blackened wings
                charred feathers
Letting it all just grow inside
A mass of arms and legs tangled tight
No tongue to speak away the fright
 
You didn’t know me
When I thought my stuffed animals could save me
When I wouldn’t tattle because he scared me
                in his room
Wanting to cry but making up fantastical lies
in my head
 
You didn’t know me
When the hand covered my mouth
When my eyes opened wide
                lit up by moonlight
Hoping it would come to an end
in the early morning light
 
You didn’t know me
When the moon collided with this world
When everything shattered into pearls
                Or maybe it was glass
Picking them up always cut deep to the bone
inside my skin
 
Part III
 
You didn’t know me
When everything was right in my world
You only met me
After everything got turned inside out
And at the bottom I lay, curled
 
You didn’t know me, but now you do
So please handle carefully
I know you know how to
Just...watch out for splinters and sudden ledges
While you carefully tend my wounds with bandages
 
And try to soothe
all my burnt edges
 
You didn’t know me then,
But now,
You do.

And now it's up to you
To wipe away soot and smudges
It's up to you.