I'm not perfect but...

I'm not perfect
I'm far from it
I tell myself I'm sorry
But my mind won't accept it
My sense of humour is warped
I guess my filter is broken
These are my excuses
True words are unspoken
Am I afraid ?
I don't want to get hurt again
Push all you like but
I just can't let you in
I will stay closed
And not walk into the open
Sometimes I'll say
Stuff that I don't even mean
Because you react and it keeps you away from me
I know I'm not a bad person
I wish I would let you see

I know I'm alone
My heart aches for affection
I don't want to hurt you
So I'll live in detention

I'm so sorry
I'm not perfect
I'm not perfect
I'm not
I'm not
I'm no
I'm no
I am
Am I ?
Am I even human ?