A Christmas Miracle

I cannot keep these hoes away
They hunger for my dick
But once a year on Christmas Day
My life becomes a hallmark flick

Bust a nutcrackers line my shelves
I don my Santa hat
I cook some cookies shaped like Elves
And hand them out at the laundromat

I share cocaine with all the kids
Who come from broken homes
And sleep well knowing what I did
Baby Jesus will condone

Merry Christmas to all my bitches