Life

I would say this is another example of multiple poems under one title.  
 
It is "narrator centric" in Stanzas 1 thru 3 - the focus is on "I".  
 
Then it becomes about War in 4.  
 
Then it becomes about sound and song in 5.  
 
6 and 8 are focused on "we".  
 
7 is alluding to depression.  

I would personally split it up into different poems.
 
If you want this to read as a singular cohesive poem, you would benefit from tying the segments together somehow.  
 
For example, what can you insert into Stanzas 1 thru 3 and 5 thru 8 about war and its machinery?  
 
Stanza 1  
 
"I am in a hard place  
Simple things no grace  
I lose feeling and pace  
My words erase"  
 
Stanza 1 integrated with elements of a war theme  
 
"I am bunkered down in a hard place  
Under fire by simpleton poets lacking style and grace  
Shellshocked, I lose feeling and pace  
My stanzas? Buildings their bombs erase"  
 
And so forth.

i kind of disagree
but then again, i have never considered myself as a seasoned (real) writer (having command and confidence of the American English language, i've discovered, does not make one a good writer)

I read 2 areas of discomfort for me but the overall spill is connected and almost well spilled.

Brother, you are free to disagree.

I'm only pointing out areas where improvement can be made by offering up "analytical observations" from someone who requested such.

Can the poem be read as a whole? Sure.

Just to help others understand. I explained the meaning in the comments. I understand how I screwed up so I'm trying to help people learn what I meant. I created metaphors and broke them down to create the story of life. This wasn't intended to be about the poem but the message.

Well i screwed up at first so they didn't understand the point. My title is the story. It's the message I intented to send.

I get it. I write with a lot of thinking involved. I didn't mean to act hateful or dishonest. I just wanted someone to read it like a Rubix Cube because I love puzzles. I don't hate your words they all are valid. It was misunderstood on my part as an attack mainly because of what you ended it with. The truth is I wasn't looking to make this poem viewed for its structure but it's meaning. You are a great critic and I do respect you. I just struggle with my own self confidence sometimes to where I drive people away. I do need to compact it as bad as I can. You are right about that. What I was looking for was some acknowledgement of the meaning. I understand I didn't make it clear and I understand others don't want to have to do a puzzle. I'm sorry if I offended either or or ahvati. I can't remember the exact spelling but the point is for these types of things maybe just perform it. We all are similar even within outer differences. My problem is i speak with rhythm and poise with every little thing i think or say that I forget to realize we all didn't have the same past.

1.   I am In a hard place    
   Simple things no grace    
     I lose feeling and pace    
             My words erase    
   
 Meaning.     I have no idea who I am    
                      Things never go my way    
                 I am struggling within myself    
                                          I'm failing    
   
2.                It is a chase    
                Hard to find space    
                  It is time to race    
   I move foward just in case    
        
Meaning:     You are always moving    
                     Hard to find what u need    
                             I need to get going    
                But make sure I have a plan    
 3.           I plead my case    
    They call me a strange sort    
          I am a different face    
       The ball is in your court    
   
Meaning:      I try to explain    
                   They say I'm crazy    
                       I am different    
                   I'll do what I want    
   
4.        War moves men to tears    
     We never get away from fears    
     Machines have different gears    
            It listens to what it hears    
   
Meaning:       We all cry from pain    
                 We can never stop crying    
                      Everyone is different    
                     We do what we believe    
   
5.              Sound is a song    
     It is neither right nor wrong    
             Words will feel long  
       Emotions those are strong    
     
Meaning: Our words create music    
                        Believe in yourself    
                        It might feel wordy    
                             Use emotion    
   
6.     We all need interaction    
   Without that no satisfaction    
         No chance for relaxation    
       Plenty of condemnation    
   
Meaning:   We need a friend    
                  Or else not happy    
                   No thinking great    
                  Plenty of self hate    
   
7.                 Rain falls    
       Darkness feels like light    
                  Cave walls    
             Nothing bright    
   
Meaning:                   Life screws you    
                 You are in an inner struggle    
                               Can't get out    
                         Complete darkness    
   
8.                            The starry sun    
            I keep waiting for the day to be done    
                         Doesn't know we are    
                     Without it we are no one    
   
Meaning :       Our hero    
                   They might die    
                   They don't know we care    
                 They made us.    
   
   
I hope you enjoyed it. It was all a metaphor.  
I'm going to put the poem first and then put meaning at end. I just didn't think someone would see this literally. I tried to tell a story and I guess I didn't explain that in my notes. It was meant to be inspirational and I guess maybe observational makes sense. I write self observational poetry.
                     
             
       
   
   
   
   
          
               
   
          
          
   
                      
                   

I merely suggest that you make the poem more cohesive for readers who won't make the connections and who won't have the benefit of your notes.

I get it it's just how I write I'm going to put it in my notes next time. I get it I really do. I can't think less I have tried. It is the story of life in beautiful imagery. It wasn't literal.

As long as you comprehend that what I volunteered was feedback in the form of "analytical observations" and not "misinterpretations" of your stanzas, we're square.  

I do get it. I' was trying to be let people figure it out themselves but I realized no one thinks like me so I'm will do that next time. Thanks for the feedback. I do appreciate it I just forgot to show the way to read the poem.

1 is about down luck
2 is about keeping yourself together
3 is saying how different is better
4 is about setback and having to move on
5 is about the beauty of poetry.  Do what you want
6 is about needing someone to be ok
7 is about the feeling of complete loss of hope
8 is about our heroes and how they might not know whi we are before they die

Your poem is the story of my life. Frayed emotions that struggle to heal. Being an outsider among "normals". Each of your lines builds upon the previous ones to create a story of compelling power. Love your metaphorical explorations as the poem unfolds. Enjoyed reading this and feeling like I met a kindred spirit.

John

Of course I thought I should let others try to figure it out but I am different so now I show how I think.

As long as you are getting a good response to your poem and your poetry in general - i.e. people like it, that's all that matters.

very awesome write has many sides to it
1. lost
2. confused
3. searching but not finding
4. lack of self confidence
just look deep with in your self and you shall find every thing you seek mostly believe in your self
i put what i read to be of many people are looking for in life

The true meaning was life. I break down all lines in the comments.

answers are of life

Firstly, it's good to get our feelings out through poetry.  Sharing helps us grow as poets; therefore, no effort is wasted.  Secondly, and maybe most importantly, if you have to explain your poem in detail to others, then you've failed in both message and perception, as in dictating it for the reader via explaining what you meant, rather than allowing the reader to discern for themselves. This, combined with seemingly forced rhyme in many places makes this an almost predictable read.  

You say, "this isn't about the poem but the message".  Then why write a poem? Why not just write your message in prose?  That way, at least you would not have to explain it to everyone.  That may be a good exercise for you in the future. Write out your message in prose.  Then, break it down, see how you can dissect a poem from it.  

I wrote emotions it's not words. I broke down those phrases in my comments and notes. The words are nothing more than feeling. The truth is what I broke down. It's not meant to be looked at as just one thing. The way I wrote it is how each line is broken down is the passion you feel for that line. I was writing it a little differently. I see it. Maybe you can't. But words are nothing more than emotions. We all want to find our true selves. I get it. But I still see my vision. Reason why I say this is all of it was metaphors. Not one true physical thing.

Firstly, I am not going to get into a long, drawn out debate with you over my opinion.  It's my opinion and you requested it.  Secondly, don't defend your truth; it doesn't need it.  Defending your truth is like a tiny ant defending an elephant: precious, but unnecessary. It's your truth. Live it.  

Lastly, you could learn SO MUCH from the perception of others regarding your poetry. Unless asked a specific question, just say 'Thank you' for their interpretive opinion.