Brotherly Love

I couldn't sleep, again
I chose to read your words instead
I could hear your voice,
 by the rhythm of your thoughts,
 flowing from your scribe,
Calm and baritone

Your brotherly love,
evoked emotions in me I had cremated
long ago

Lighting a cigarette
 gave me an excuse to pause and think,
thinking on why I can't feel the sorrow
I need to cry, hard and from within the deep
Maybe then I can sleep

My grief is still froze,
crystallized and was unfairly brief
Too exhausted to breathe
 in the aftermath

I never had the choice to breakdown,
grieve properly through the stages
that would follow my soul
I only felt the hole left in the hollows,
Alone

Everyone around me shattered,
I had to be the rock for them to lean on;
as I would point them to the sky,
hoping I could teach them both to fly

I really didn't want to write tonight,
sleep deprived, staring at the screen
One day, two flights

 I'm not a smoker
 a stale pack I hide in a drawer
for the grief
When I need to feel the pain
 It feels good to burn my throat
Shallow minded am I

Her wings are heavy
Entwined over mine
Her span is wide
 My feathers are stronger

My twin and I
One soul
I was the stone
She was the sculptor of
our spiritual heritage

I must say this,
your words felt like home,
like brotherly love and the smell of coffee

Now I am bound to read your words
 Frightened by the similarities
I tip my hat in gratitude
 as you tip yours
 I did notice you left open
a doorway,
 where I may go,
to heal my mind
 
I am glad i wrote tonight

Thank you for becoming a poet