deepundergroundpoetry.com
Give Me A Pillow
Today I went to work and instead of
cleaning the house I meditated and
prayed with the family as their beloved
17 year old Golden Retriever layed on
the floor waiting to crossover, he is still
with us. Letting go is so unbelievably
hard. I couldn't clean. I couldnt do
anything worthwhile except cry.
I left emptied. I couldn't go home,
Maryanne needed me next. I went and
got her a pizza I gave her CBD and her
her night meds, I gave Sandy her sickly
cat his special food and his meds.
I then cleaned up possum poop and all
her litter boxes and took the trash out.
Then I had to adjust the heat because
its always set to 99 and I put it at an
unreasonable 83. I give Maryann a hug
and kissed her forehead I tell her to lock
the door behind me, I wait til I hear the click and then make way to my van.
I haven't even started the engine and
Anthony texts and is already sitting
in front of my house, before I can reply
to him Donna calls me and has made
meatballs and mashed potatoes so
I pick her up on my way to meet
Anthony at my house, we pull in, and
Maryanne is calling me because she
is sure someone has stolen her checks
and debit card, I reassure her and tell
her where to look and she finds them.
I can't even unlock my front door
when my phones is ringing again,
its Maryanne and she is sure someone
has come and taken her checks and
debit card again, I say again where they
are. I finally get in my house and drop
my purse on the floor I dont even have
one shoe off before maryanne calls me
again, with the same concerns and we
go through it all again. Anthony, Donna
and I all sit down for a well deserved
glass of wine and a fat joint, but then
my phone rings again now it's Lewis
and he's had a rough day and is coming
over also, then Felicity beeps in and
is heading my way also.
I am tired. I'm tired when I wake up
I'm tired as I feed my animals Im tired
when I'm giving the lonely their hugs
I'm tired as I'm smiling at everyone
I'm tired of the news I'm tired of them,
I'm tired of you, I'm tired as I write
this, but I'm needed, so....
cleaning the house I meditated and
prayed with the family as their beloved
17 year old Golden Retriever layed on
the floor waiting to crossover, he is still
with us. Letting go is so unbelievably
hard. I couldn't clean. I couldnt do
anything worthwhile except cry.
I left emptied. I couldn't go home,
Maryanne needed me next. I went and
got her a pizza I gave her CBD and her
her night meds, I gave Sandy her sickly
cat his special food and his meds.
I then cleaned up possum poop and all
her litter boxes and took the trash out.
Then I had to adjust the heat because
its always set to 99 and I put it at an
unreasonable 83. I give Maryann a hug
and kissed her forehead I tell her to lock
the door behind me, I wait til I hear the click and then make way to my van.
I haven't even started the engine and
Anthony texts and is already sitting
in front of my house, before I can reply
to him Donna calls me and has made
meatballs and mashed potatoes so
I pick her up on my way to meet
Anthony at my house, we pull in, and
Maryanne is calling me because she
is sure someone has stolen her checks
and debit card, I reassure her and tell
her where to look and she finds them.
I can't even unlock my front door
when my phones is ringing again,
its Maryanne and she is sure someone
has come and taken her checks and
debit card again, I say again where they
are. I finally get in my house and drop
my purse on the floor I dont even have
one shoe off before maryanne calls me
again, with the same concerns and we
go through it all again. Anthony, Donna
and I all sit down for a well deserved
glass of wine and a fat joint, but then
my phone rings again now it's Lewis
and he's had a rough day and is coming
over also, then Felicity beeps in and
is heading my way also.
I am tired. I'm tired when I wake up
I'm tired as I feed my animals Im tired
when I'm giving the lonely their hugs
I'm tired as I'm smiling at everyone
I'm tired of the news I'm tired of them,
I'm tired of you, I'm tired as I write
this, but I'm needed, so....
Published 8th Jan 2020
Author's Note
My photo
Rest In Peace, sweet old Lucky.
Rest In Peace, sweet old Lucky.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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8th Jan 2020 11:50am
Sounds like yr friend has "some problems" that go way beyond dying critters.
You, however, are a sweetheart.
You, however, are a sweetheart.
9th Jan 2020 1:03pm
8th Jan 2020 3:50pm
Nikki you're a kind, caring, giving soul. That does become weary at times ( well, most times ); however, your reward will be great. Kinda worried about Maryanne there - sounds like dementia is taking hold. I had a 92 year-old neighbor pass away last year from it. I would get so angry with her daughter for allowing her to live alone. She clearly wasn't able, and her daughter finally realized that when she came over one morning and her mother had fallen that evening and laid there all damn night. I was livid because I kept telling her she needed help - she would wander outside and we'd guide her back in. It was horrible until she got help.
Then my social services stepped in on my other neighbor, who was 72, and committed her to an assisted living facility due to dementia. Glenda was cool too, she was a true flower child, and I believe heavy drug use in the 60's was her biggest problem. When she got lost uptown paying her water bill, someone decided it was time to do something. It's been a rough year here losing two good neighbors and my 14 year-old dog as well.
I wanted to express this to let you know I understand exactly how you feel! I do hope you had a good evening with your friends. xo
Then my social services stepped in on my other neighbor, who was 72, and committed her to an assisted living facility due to dementia. Glenda was cool too, she was a true flower child, and I believe heavy drug use in the 60's was her biggest problem. When she got lost uptown paying her water bill, someone decided it was time to do something. It's been a rough year here losing two good neighbors and my 14 year-old dog as well.
I wanted to express this to let you know I understand exactly how you feel! I do hope you had a good evening with your friends. xo
9th Jan 2020 1:02pm
Yes Maryanne has dementia. Its age related she is 91. She is a wonderful person. her mind is going but her little body is so strong. She just needs a little reminding. She is lonely also. I do way more than what im paid for but its okay.
She didnt have any kids. She has 5 cats and a possum. And a nephew and he is her guardian but he is really good to her. He wont put her in a facility because he knows she would die without her animals.
Im tired but its worth it.
She didnt have any kids. She has 5 cats and a possum. And a nephew and he is her guardian but he is really good to her. He wont put her in a facility because he knows she would die without her animals.
Im tired but its worth it.
9th Jan 2020 3:43am
Damn, Scheherazade, your day never ends. So much relating, not enough hibernation
9th Jan 2020 1:04pm
9th Jan 2020 12:58pm
Sometimes it seems the heart can stretch to infinity ... But it may be one's soul so pure with love that can manage the feat day after day in near thankless stretching of one's sanity ... Thank you Nikki for being such an exceptional soul ... Bless and much love to you and all whom you shepherd ...
You are allowed to rest ... Love ... .
You are allowed to rest ... Love ... .
9th Jan 2020 1:05pm
9th Jan 2020 5:33pm
