Sleep paralysis

you pass out  
crying
into a dead, dream-less sleep
well, you do almost  
atleast,
and then  
almost as if on cue,
a violent electricity  
crackles hard;
it ricochets down your spine
like a wild lightening
dancing in your periphery-
a foreshadow
that is ultimately
predicting a red  
tunnel vision
from your soul
 
eyes flutter-
yet those stupid limbs  
of yours struggle wildly
for any freedom until
the point of a fraile bone
that's now
piercing a sensitive spot
so incredibly
deep inside  
of the soft tissue
accenting the lining
of your aching right calf,
just pops;
a charlie horse,
and it
rips you awake-
and you have to dig,
fucking dig;
dig deep against the sheets
in a haze
.. so petrified
and desperate
 
focus  
fucking breathe
I'm so fucking scared
 
vision blurs
sleeping limbs
strain-
sweat,
fear,
panic fueling  
hopelessness,
and a reminder of a unique
gift
that's in sync;
one that curses
the restless marching
that's now stomping;
harassing deep
against the staccato  
vibrating the truth
of my heart
 
one full second of nothing
and then  
it's there
a paralyzing  
moment of realization
and later, after, a ripple of goosebumps  
that can only be described as  
the human embodiment
of a sixth sense
that's shrill for survival
and ominous
for escapism;
and it makes you positively
snap
 
I can't move
 
you lay there
staring at the wall  
on the left side of your existence-
a familiarity that never once felt like
anything but safe
up until literally
right fucking now
in this less than
one minute  
of every terror
that could have possibly
leaked out  
and surround you
from within the very
darkness that posses  
your still frame
 
I can't move
 
not a single sound can tear away,
can be liberated
from your  
quavering lips..
not a word
shhhhh
your muscles begin to throb
in response to  
obsession
 
MOVE
damn it  
move, please god
just move

suddenly,  
your thoughts sound too loud
the air is folding around your body,
something is right behind me
your breathe catches,
and you concede the fight
it's over now..
you stop resisting..
a sharp  
cold breeze  
wraps around your core
and you freeze-
eternity mocks your life  
for yet another second
before an indescribable force
yanks you;
slams your back audibly
against the bed  
 
I didn't do that
did i fucking do that?!
I didn't do that
 
There's no time to think-
an instant later you're  
flying;
sitting straight up
and now facing
the inside of the room but
E
   ry      i        i
  V     tH nG         sp           g
                       S        NNin
 
there's too many colors
merging and  
dying and
so much blue and yellow  
and transcendent irregularities
that don't have reason
               I'm lost
                        I'm lost
                             Where am i?
you forget
what is happening  
you forgot
but  
it's over now
faster  
fast
just as fast  
as when you blacked
colored?
out
 
portal
  Fucking portal
 
you don't understand why that come's to mind  
you blink
and
it's over  
it's been over
the shock wears off;
anxiety resonates
in your legs and you run-
run right out of all reason,
right out of the house  
and onto the porch;
you run,
but it is over
 
for a  
night