Since I Quit Smoking

Since I quit smoking
Everybody is prettier
Sexually speaking
That the faces are a blur and their speech is mumbling
I say to her,
If you can only give me a hug
To stop this vibration
Of irritable sensation
And while you are at it
You can told hold of my prediction
We dont need no lubrication

Since I quit smoking
Time has no meaning
There is no beginning or end
Only middle
All day and every day is the middle
No resolve to any activity, only a middle
Being in a constant state of dying, but never dead
OR in a constant state of dead, but never rest
I can feel this on the edges of my skin
Trying to get to the middle middle of myself
In hopes to discover something
Some kind of profoundness about my life
Or sage wisdom about life in general
Would that end time? Would I feel a death?

Since I quit smoking
I taste things
often and a lot
Too much
How do I control the feeling of burning heartache
That I seem to have to dull it through the power of digestion?
Until I become awakened to a new sense of taste

Since I quit smoking
I am not sure where I am going
Or if I know what I am doing
Or if I ever had any idea, even when I did smoke
I was just more confident to bullshit myself.
But its a day today. Only a day. Ordinary. Normal. Today.
And right now, thats all I got as my best friend.