I cant remember

Unwelcome.
Contempt.
Unwanted.
Caged.
Every time you walk in and see me your expression turns sour.
Your smiles turn to frowns.
Your laughs to agitated sighs.
I cant remember the last time i felt truely welcome.
I cant remember the last time i wasnt a weight around your neck.
I cant remember the last time i couldn't feel the chill of your stare, so full of contempt.
Resentment rolls off your aura in vibrational waves that always takes my light away.
We dont talk anymore because it always ends in fights where im always the problem.
I cant remember the last time i felt like i really mattered to my mother.
Im just her scapegoat.
Im just in the way.
I wasnt born a boy.
I cant remember anymore.