Best Laid Plans

All the deft planning in the world
Does not do a world of good
The scheming might as well be hurled
Since I've screwed up since childhood

But I had it all quite well worked out
And came packing a loaded gun
She still insisted on that lout
His sweet notion of nocturnal fun

But I am really quite a shot
And placed a round right to his heart
The schmuck hit ground right on the spot
His splatter constituted art

She did not seem at all distressed
But sighed she did not give a fuck
She stood by me and got undressed
And said I had a change of luck

In bed I had to please her well
Bury my face between her thighs
She did not want to go through hell
And listen to a gunman's lies.