The Act: Reborn

 
It won't stop screaming
  In my head.
Lower down behind my spine
Hot. Burning.

It talks so loud lately
  I ran so far
So I could not hear the sounds

But it meant
I could not hear anything-

It found me
Once again
I lay here
   With my heart pounding
Behind my ears
In my hands
Lower stomach

Swallowing hard
I'll linger

So what if i indulge in what I crave so damn much
Just 1
Will become 500

But if I keep in the motions
Stay in love with it
Oh honestly it felt better than you did

It wants to crush me again
Just so I can run back to fix the pieces momentarily  
The silver loves me more
   The pain felt better
      The sacrifice was mine to give

If i only
Was to indulge...
Just a slice..maybe 3..

And if i continue to refuse ?
If i fight back
Throw it away
Walk away

It will in turn crush me to death eventually

So..what does it really matter
One way or another
It wins

Maybe just one...won't feel to bad..
No one had to know..
Just and only me..