I am My Own Stalker

I follow me wherever I go
It’s an urge I can’t break

Sometimes I sneak up
On me like a shadow

I regularly walk my dog
I walk the dogs dog as well

Wherever I choose to go
I tend to go as well

Last night I went to a bar
And I came with me

I followed me home
In the dead of night

I felt aroused
So did I

I write love poems on post-it notes
I never, ever read them they’re private

I have been known to steal
My underwear of the line

I sometimes masturbate
Whilst I watch intently

Nobody beats me up
Any better than I can

There’s self deprecation
Just between I and me

I don’t mind being alone
I am already alone

I love me
I love me too

But sometimes I
Creep me out

Somebody said there was
Me myself and I

That’s just silly
It’s just the two of us