Try Again

Try again
Every day got a little harder
Every hour seemed a little longer
Every tear made me feel
A little... stronger.
Every sunset, I reminded myself
It will...
come again.
Just be patient
Wait out the dark
Don't let the figments of your imagination overwhelm you
They are, after all,
Fake.
When it gets dark
I put this pen to this page
And I show you my thoughts
I illustrate my pain
I define my beauty.
I know now that it exists.
There is beauty within me
And it was born from the very first tear I wiped from my face
The first time I stood up tall
And I whispered
"Fuck you... this is my life."
All this pain is just temporary
Your memory is short
And nothing lasts forever
I'd try to start over but still
You judge me for my past
But what does that do for your future
What does putting me down do for you?
Nothing.
I won't confine myself in the words you assigned me.
I have to believe that you were wrong.
Because I'm not what you said.
So try again.
Try again to knock me down
Because here I stand.
Stronger than ever.
Try again to steal my thunder.
Because here I roar.
Louder than I knew I could.
Try again to tell me I'm not worthy
Because that isn't up to you
You don't get to decide.
Fuck you. This is MY life.
cast your stones.
I built a bullet proof cast around my broken heart.
And signed it myself.
For just a moment
Stop taking shots
And read the barely visible words written across my bruised and beaten body
Every word spoken to me
Every scar left over
Is seared into my skin.
Including the ones you left.
The first time you called me a freak...
The first time you called me ugly...
The first time I started to believe it.
All of it's there...
Do you see it?
The first time you knocked me down...
The first time your harsh fists met my face...
The first time I let you get away with it.
I see it.
Your goal was to knock me down.
To make me hate myself.
And the worst part is...
that's there too.
I hate myself is written bold across my back but across my chest
Says different.
You did a lot of this to me.
And I was down for a while.
But I'm on my feet now.
I'm standing strong now.
I'm still saying
Fuck. You. This is MY life.
You'll never break me.
But I'll say it one more time.
Try again.