PHOBIC

 
I am HOMOPHOBIC
I have an irrational fear
That all homo-sapiens
Are complete bastards
 
I am ISLAMOPHOBIC
I have a strange fear
That my lamb chop
Isn’t actually lamb
 
I am TRANSPHOBIC
I have an odd fear
Of smelt seats
On public transport
 
I am AGROPHOBIC
I have an irrational fear
Of confrontation
And violent street fights
 
I am LESBOPHOBIC
I have a strange fear
Of all people who come from
The Greek Island of Lesbos
 
I am BIPHOBIC
I have an odd fear of
Bicycle falls and injuries
Especially to my crotch
 
I am JUDEOPHOBIC
I have an irrational fear
Of being locked in a room
With “Hey Jude” playing on a loop
 
I am PHOBICPHOBIC
I have a strange fear of fear
I am PHOBICPHOBICPHOBIC
I have an odd fear
Of being fearful
Of fears
 
Need I go on?