deepundergroundpoetry.com
KNIFE
Born into violence and spite
Your nightmare was my morning
And this fear my air
And this my last meal
Chewed slowly and slower
So every bite explodes
The wine blooms heady
The boys sip noiselessly
Eating without sound
Listening for a chair
Scrape above the squeak
Of knife scrape first
Against plate
That electricity or spirit that enlivened them
I shared
Our organs our mothers the same
Yet our naked differences
This confluence of coincidence
Had led us to this last supper
I made my peace and found my anger
I flipped the switch
And my hate became my mantra
I am unlike me
You would not like me
You are not like me
I will bite your fuckin face off
It was my pride that had undone me
And now pride kept me fighting
Their blood in my mouth
Iron their taste
Outside a rose sunset
Behind me the door closed
*for that Anger comp
Your nightmare was my morning
And this fear my air
And this my last meal
Chewed slowly and slower
So every bite explodes
The wine blooms heady
The boys sip noiselessly
Eating without sound
Listening for a chair
Scrape above the squeak
Of knife scrape first
Against plate
That electricity or spirit that enlivened them
I shared
Our organs our mothers the same
Yet our naked differences
This confluence of coincidence
Had led us to this last supper
I made my peace and found my anger
I flipped the switch
And my hate became my mantra
I am unlike me
You would not like me
You are not like me
I will bite your fuckin face off
It was my pride that had undone me
And now pride kept me fighting
Their blood in my mouth
Iron their taste
Outside a rose sunset
Behind me the door closed
*for that Anger comp
Published 26th Jan 2017
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likes 11
reading list entries 1
comments 12
reads 1074
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
26th Jan 2017 10:43am
Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant description! The build up was INTENSE! You captured the mindset of the predator so well in the opening lines, and the 7th stanza... it was like Michael Banner doing Shakespeare, "Don't make me angry, you wouldn't like me when I'm angry", except your delivery is so elegantly vicious. Outstanding poetry! All the best in the comp, whale.
26th Jan 2017 5:43pm
26th Jan 2017 12:14pm
26th Jan 2017 5:44pm
26th Jan 2017 12:24pm
26th Jan 2017 5:45pm
26th Jan 2017 6:20pm
That final couplet carries more strength in two lines that an iron bridge, Brother. Or, should I say a steel blade? Well done!
26th Jan 2017 9:47pm
26th Jan 2017 11:44pm
I agree that the intensity of this write is palpable, the descriptors are visceral. I could imagine heads lowered over plates, eyes raised, could hear the sound of the cutlery scrape. I think you will do well in the comp. Best wishes!
27th Jan 2017 4:53pm
Anger, and rage--suffered in controlled silence--are perhaps no less intense, than those released in violence,...and often help us to realize that :
At the end of the day, it takes more inner-strength to turn the ' knife-blade ' inward...to close the door on a part of our past, and simply walk away...
Both symbolically, and metaphorically, I feel your choice of a knife creates the underlying tension that allows your readers to experience the intensity of the poet's deep-seeded anger, and rage.when faced with the final confrontation,,,the ultimate test of inner strength...
as a matter of fact, i read this with an anxious,breath held anticipation of an expected brutal finale...( until your 6th stanza)
Very effective!!
My very best to you in the comp! .
At the end of the day, it takes more inner-strength to turn the ' knife-blade ' inward...to close the door on a part of our past, and simply walk away...
Both symbolically, and metaphorically, I feel your choice of a knife creates the underlying tension that allows your readers to experience the intensity of the poet's deep-seeded anger, and rage.when faced with the final confrontation,,,the ultimate test of inner strength...
as a matter of fact, i read this with an anxious,breath held anticipation of an expected brutal finale...( until your 6th stanza)
Very effective!!
My very best to you in the comp! .
29th Jan 2017 8:56pm
Darling, darling, darling.. .I've no words
because this one got truly personal.. .
for me..
wow, my heart went thump and
my soul said.."ssshh.. hush now..all will
be fine"
My dear whale.. .
-Howlings
because this one got truly personal.. .
for me..
wow, my heart went thump and
my soul said.."ssshh.. hush now..all will
be fine"
My dear whale.. .
-Howlings
30th Jan 2017 11:28am
