Something dead

I was talking to myself this morning.
Trying to figure out what it is that I am mourning.
Crazy thing is ...I awoke with this dread.
Something's gone from me...
Something's dead.
I told me "Stop it, don't think about it anymore!"
But I couldn't stop the hole that thought had already
begun to bore.
Into my very soul it had embossed.
A deep agonizing feeling of pain for something lost.
I couldn't shake it no matter how I tried.
Something was gone.
Something had died.
I attempted to smile and be happy, but to the sadness I'd succumb.
I feel isolated... I feel numb.
Something has left me.
Something is all wrong.
I feel as if... As if I don't belong.
What is this anomalous indigo?
I am not me.
The person I was, I...I can not see.
Crazy thing is...I awoke with this dread.
Perhaps it is I that I mourn...I who is dead.