Whiskey and a Blow Job from God on the House

Before the storm  
sank its teeth into Main Street  
Amy decided to go on a drunk  
Not a regular little  
I'm still tipsy  
the morning after affair  
more a howling  
raging  
wild bitch of an animal  
ready to spit a razzle  
with anyone who spoiled her fun  
 
An hour before midnight  
the trees down by the river  
were already bending like whores  
gusting strong enough  
to snatch the panties and bra  
from any decent god fearing female  
misfortune might oblige  
to shake a titty outside  
 
Lock down in the bar  
with free drinks on the house  
Amy found herself face to face  
with fifteen stranded  
lumber yard guys  
hornier than quarterbacks  
on Spring break  
a bad ass guarantee  
the shit was all set to fly  
 
And she did not disappoint  
Jumping up on the bar top  
and yelling: 'There ain't a  
no brains man alive  
I can't satisfy  
with just these lips  
and my little finger'  
sure made everyone forget  
all about the storm outside  
 
Next she popped  
the buttons on her dress  
letting the silky red fabric  
fall slowliciously down  
exposing fine firm breasts  
that pleaded: 'Jesus,
take me up and  
suck me now'  
 
Laughing as she poked  
a nipple sorer than a hangnail  
in the startled barman's eye  
with one finger inside her panties  
and a wet little thumb in her mouth  
she called out: ' The first guy here  
to last more than five  
gets to do me doggy style...  
Bet none of you has the balls  
to try'  
But the stampede that ensued  
seemed the best indication  
that none of those fuckers  
cared to decline  
 
The problem of an orderly queue  
was soon put to rights by drawing lots  
High numbers  
would get to try first  
with the barman keeping time  
on the side  
 
Contender number one  
looked a sure fire  
muscle grubber  
His cock  
sprang out of his pants  
like a jack knife  
when he learned  
he'd drawn first try  
 
Amy smirked  
took a great big slug  
from the bottle  
but before she could  
gobble down her first nine incher  
the building shook like a zombie funeral  
all the shutters burst  
and the windows blew clean out  
as the storm struck  
directly overhead
 
They called it an act of God  
how she was sucked up into the sky  
They never recovered her body  
maybe all that whiskey  
had given her wings to fly  
but not a nipple or a single hair  
from her drunken little pussy  
was ever seen again  
and so those boys never did find out  
who won the bragging rights
though some said God
wanted first in line