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Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
A broken woman like me is too open, too honest with her dishabille heart. kindness hurts & love hurts more, but there I go giving it away like free sex in a sleazy back alley with no name.
It takes a whore to extract the proper price from a man, for the use, & the abuse; cheap thrills should never be cheap. and I thought the same was true about love: It takes a whore.
I came for the poetry and stayed for the company, certainly not looking for love. I gave myself to you in the dark, you hold me closer than any man, ever, and we dance to the songs that are only meant to be heard between the stars.
Nighthawks like us thrive in the dark, clandestine, to make love without being accused, judged for our sins. we expose ourselves to our reflective, craving eyes, all the way down to our bare feet.
A counterbalance of loneliness falls from our rapacious lips; we chase a hillbilly moon, claim the deserted back roads, and fall to our knees in the dirt as passion floods our veins and the sun must turn us into phantoms once more...
It takes a whore to extract the proper price from a man, for the use, & the abuse; cheap thrills should never be cheap. and I thought the same was true about love: It takes a whore.
I came for the poetry and stayed for the company, certainly not looking for love. I gave myself to you in the dark, you hold me closer than any man, ever, and we dance to the songs that are only meant to be heard between the stars.
Nighthawks like us thrive in the dark, clandestine, to make love without being accused, judged for our sins. we expose ourselves to our reflective, craving eyes, all the way down to our bare feet.
A counterbalance of loneliness falls from our rapacious lips; we chase a hillbilly moon, claim the deserted back roads, and fall to our knees in the dirt as passion floods our veins and the sun must turn us into phantoms once more...
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 12
reading list entries 1
comments 19
reads 969
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The author encourages honest critique.
Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
some things are beautiful. some things go beyond beauty.
the road may be long or short, but I'll keep you with me,
whatever I turn into...
the road may be long or short, but I'll keep you with me,
whatever I turn into...
1
Re: Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
20th Oct 2016 11:22am
Your comment goes beyond that beauty,John,as does your passion. No matter the road,we travel together.
Thank you for such passionate words,I keep them with me....
Thank you for such passionate words,I keep them with me....
Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
20th Oct 2016 12:04pm
As you are both aware; I am a fan of collaboration poetry.
This is amongst the top collabs, I have seen. It's a duet in it's delivery and hot and saucy in the respective narrations.
The title is extremely kind in it's giving of a clean slate to work from. And the opening stanza serves it well.
The second stanza is definately my favourite here.
The ending echoes that perfectly "in a phantom state"
Definately a thumbs up on this one from me!
Blue Skies @ you both
Al-x-
This is amongst the top collabs, I have seen. It's a duet in it's delivery and hot and saucy in the respective narrations.
The title is extremely kind in it's giving of a clean slate to work from. And the opening stanza serves it well.
The second stanza is definately my favourite here.
The ending echoes that perfectly "in a phantom state"
Definately a thumbs up on this one from me!
Blue Skies @ you both
Al-x-
2
Re: Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
I'm not as familiar with your work as some,but your comment was so amazing that it left me at a loss for words.
I enjoyed this collaboration emmensely,such beautiful things were created and I am truly honored by the sharing of your insights,your wonderful compliments.
John is such a talented writer and it's always a pleasure to join him in these creative processes,such a unique and inspiring expirience.
A clean slate deserves poetry to make it beautiful....
Thank you so much for the amazing thumbs up!
I enjoyed this collaboration emmensely,such beautiful things were created and I am truly honored by the sharing of your insights,your wonderful compliments.
John is such a talented writer and it's always a pleasure to join him in these creative processes,such a unique and inspiring expirience.
A clean slate deserves poetry to make it beautiful....
Thank you so much for the amazing thumbs up!
Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
20th Oct 2016 12:16pm
and I thought the same was true about love: It takes a whore.
Love this line!
and we dance to the songs that are only meant to be heard between the stars.
Wow!!
and fall to our knees in the dirt as passion floods our veins and the sun must turn us into phantoms once more...
And what an epic ending!!
Kudos to you and John! Excellent work!
Love this line!
and we dance to the songs that are only meant to be heard between the stars.
Wow!!
and fall to our knees in the dirt as passion floods our veins and the sun must turn us into phantoms once more...
And what an epic ending!!
Kudos to you and John! Excellent work!
2
Re: Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
20th Oct 2016 7:49pm
Thank you so much. Glad you enjoyed the final result.
The makings of true love under the stars,songs of passion,and phantoms of the night...
Such a breathtaking creative process came out of this and it wouldn't have been nearly as beautiful without,John to give it that amazing edge....
The makings of true love under the stars,songs of passion,and phantoms of the night...
Such a breathtaking creative process came out of this and it wouldn't have been nearly as beautiful without,John to give it that amazing edge....
Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
20th Oct 2016 2:22pm
"Nighthawks like us thrive in the dark" and "we chase a hillbilly moon"
love the whole write it's amazing you dance so beautifully together..
but those lines struck me..
wonderful collaboration you simply are a poetic force..
love Crim
love the whole write it's amazing you dance so beautifully together..
but those lines struck me..
wonderful collaboration you simply are a poetic force..
love Crim
2
Re: Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
20th Oct 2016 7:57pm
Such a sweet thing to say,Crim,I do enjoy those lovely words of yours.
I find myself looking forward to reading them,just wouldn't be the same without.
Definately was a wonderful dance and it takes a talented man to lead.
Thank you,lovely Crim...
I find myself looking forward to reading them,just wouldn't be the same without.
Definately was a wonderful dance and it takes a talented man to lead.
Thank you,lovely Crim...
Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
20th Oct 2016 8:55pm
!
!
! I'm so in love with you two!,
just makes me screams surrender
to the silent kind.. bijizus
No words, nope not at all..
-Howlings
!
! I'm so in love with you two!,
just makes me screams surrender
to the silent kind.. bijizus
No words, nope not at all..
-Howlings
2
Re: Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
20th Oct 2016 9:23pm
Your lack of words,Howlings,says more than not and I thank you so much for those blank,wonderful lines. Truly touched that you came by to see us,truly I am...
Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
21st Oct 2016 2:54am
I prefer the natural flow of the conversation and this hit that right on. It takes nothing away from the poetry when you can pull that naturalness off ...excellent job! :)
2
Re: Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
21st Oct 2016 3:41am
Natural conversation,like the way it sounds in your head before you put it in verse...
That's very true,thanks for sharing.
That's very true,thanks for sharing.
Anonymous
- Edited 27th Dec 2019 12:45pm
21st Oct 2016 6:46am
<< post removed >>
Re: Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
21st Oct 2016 7:15am
Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
21st Oct 2016 5:45pm
Nighthawks like us thrive in the dark, clandestine, to make love without being accused, judged for our sins. we expose ourselves to our reflective, craving eyes, all the way down to our bare feet.
A counterbalance of loneliness falls from our rapacious lips; we chase a hillbilly moon, claim the deserted back roads, and fall to our knees in the dirt as passion floods our veins and the sun must turn us into phantoms once more...
These final stanzas are stunning in their depth of Truth. I see you both in these sitting at counters of all night cafes sipping coffee to a 3:00 AM dive sharing whiskey. Nighthawks are rare breeds that see in the darkness the beauty of a nocturnal world most sleep through. They crave the depth of dark illuminated sparsely, as though an ancient secret they hide from the world. Because, as we all know, the world would only taint it.
Beautifully done you two.
A counterbalance of loneliness falls from our rapacious lips; we chase a hillbilly moon, claim the deserted back roads, and fall to our knees in the dirt as passion floods our veins and the sun must turn us into phantoms once more...
These final stanzas are stunning in their depth of Truth. I see you both in these sitting at counters of all night cafes sipping coffee to a 3:00 AM dive sharing whiskey. Nighthawks are rare breeds that see in the darkness the beauty of a nocturnal world most sleep through. They crave the depth of dark illuminated sparsely, as though an ancient secret they hide from the world. Because, as we all know, the world would only taint it.
Beautifully done you two.
2
Re: Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
21st Oct 2016 7:25pm
Your wonderful comment leaves me stumbling for words and I believe you felt the amazing beauty hidden by star filled nights, that goes unnoticed by most.
The night holds so much beauty in its unlight backroads that to give it sunshine would be a tragedy. Perhaps,that is why we have the moon.
This collaberation was a tribute to nighthawks everywhere and it wouldn't have been nearly as good without such a talented poet to shape it into something beautiful.
Thank you, Ahavati, for one of the finest comments I've had the pleasure of reading...
The night holds so much beauty in its unlight backroads that to give it sunshine would be a tragedy. Perhaps,that is why we have the moon.
This collaberation was a tribute to nighthawks everywhere and it wouldn't have been nearly as good without such a talented poet to shape it into something beautiful.
Thank you, Ahavati, for one of the finest comments I've had the pleasure of reading...
Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
Dear Kasai! Collaborations that work, that are seamless to the reader, and its voice is as one, is truly the rare breed, knowing as I do having collab'd in such lit unions before...
and to have John the skilled wordsmith as your partner on many occasions is to dance with the rough knowing hands that enhance your own eloquent contribution as a lover with entwined pens.
(sighs)
Simply divine, you two.
~Jade x
and to have John the skilled wordsmith as your partner on many occasions is to dance with the rough knowing hands that enhance your own eloquent contribution as a lover with entwined pens.
(sighs)
Simply divine, you two.
~Jade x
1
Re: Re. Tabula Rasa ( collaboration with JohnFeddeler )
30th Nov 2016 6:16pm
Thanks for the great comment, Jade, I'm glad to see you and flattered by the very kind words.
John is not only a skilled wordsmith, but an amazing teacher, and it shows. Wouldn't have been the same without him...
John is not only a skilled wordsmith, but an amazing teacher, and it shows. Wouldn't have been the same without him...
Anonymous
- Edited 21st Oct 2019 5:45am
28th Apr 2019 3:42am
<< post removed >>