I Don't Like His Clothes

I don't like how they remind me of someone else
I don't like how my brain has formed connects
With the colors and the style of his uniform
I don't like how his sleeves remind me of a ghost
I just want to forget the other person and focus on him
It's all in my head, it's all in my fucked up memories
I don't want to remember the picture in storage
Of someone else in his uniform so proud and so tall
I want to see the man before me without seeing the ghost
If only I could I'd shoot that part of my warped mind
I pray to the gods of earth that I forget that person
And see something other than the clothes on my floor
I want to see the man in my bed, not the ghost in my head
It's been too damn long for my heart to still hurt like this
I repeat his name as I watch him sleep, trying my best
To be here in the present and not trapped in the past
He will wake up and and pull me close breaking the spell
Tell me how sweet I am and how greatful he is to his god
All while I'm reminding myself how I'm going to hell