The Expert

Usefulness has never been a quality of mine.
I'm much better suited for trying out the wine.
Folding laundry takes me hours,
Washing dishes is a bore.
How much do I really care about the kitchen floor?
Sipping tea and tasting treats to me is just sublime.
Though reading in a hammock is where I really shine.
So, if you need your lawn mowed,
Or your house cleaned,
Or your car towed;
If you need a handyman,
Or help washing your minivan;
Please don't be offended when politely I decline...
But call on me if you need help learning to unwind.