inclement

 We’ve been coasting on empty for a while now
and I’ve never be a fan of plateaus
take me up, take me down
just don’t leave me alone
with the kind of sky
that’s so devoid of life
I swear it’ll kill me
in my sleep

You were never my silver lining
I loved you for all the reasons
you were wrong for my bones

I wanted to break
and if I was going down
I was taking you with me
with bruised knuckles
chipped teeth
and whiskey stained lips
lined with the blood of your words
on my soul
that I never wanted
but asked for anyway

I wanted to find love
in every backhanded slight on your tongue
that lit every part of me on fire
in all the right ways
in all the wrong ways
in ways I hadn’t yet learnt to hurt

Instead of finding passion in the fire
of bruised wrists and black eyes
I found that hell was cold
that my cruelty was capable
of new ways of making you hurt
fire and ice melting into something
tepid and uninteresting

I can’t change the fact
that I’m all or nothing

We’ve been coasting on empty for a while now
and I’ve never be a fan of plateaus
take me up, take me down
just don’t leave me alone
with the kind of sky
that’s so devoid of life
I swear it’ll kill me
in my sleep

There are better things
worth dying for

© Indie Adams 2016