deepundergroundpoetry.com
Despair
I'm sad
Melancholy
Beset by ills
And travails
Too sensitive by far
Emotional
I feel frail
I'm told by those
Who know me
I'm stronger than I realize
I think
What they don't recognize
Is how very tired I am
Exhaustion doesn't cover it
Neither, quite, does despair
I am beset I tell you
This world may be too much for me
I've never been good at conformity
I fail time over and again
Rigid structure eludes me
Regimentation and scheduling
So not my friends
Yet I continue to try
Endeavor to fit
My creative, curving abandonment
Into
Implacable straight-edged, strait-laced austerity
In order
To survive
Within
This world
Give my children
A chance
To thrive
Yet, my misery
Is deep
Aching
Seeping
Meat and meet and mete
Day by day
Coming complete...
Published 23rd Dec 2015
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 16
reading list entries 2
comments 22
reads 1147
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
24th Dec 2015 00:04am
Dear Savaja,
I have resembling extremities attached
but also have arms as well. So, since
it's been years of not recieving hugs
from anyone... I'm going to steal one
from you.
Thank you beautiful
-Howlings
I have resembling extremities attached
but also have arms as well. So, since
it's been years of not recieving hugs
from anyone... I'm going to steal one
from you.
Thank you beautiful
-Howlings
24th Dec 2015 9:24pm
Ahhh, luv, no theft required. Freely, I give unto you; I would that no hug deficit of years had ever occurred.
Please allow me the privilege of hugging you too, mon trésor. :-*
Merci beaucoup.
Please allow me the privilege of hugging you too, mon trésor. :-*
Merci beaucoup.
Anonymous
- Edited 25th Sep 2020 3:45am
24th Dec 2015 00:09am
<< post removed >>
24th Dec 2015 9:32pm
Ahhh, Schiitaryn, luv, I grieve and commiserate to find you here with me. Tis a most distressing place, ne c'est pas? And, of course, words are inadequate it seems.
I will share that hug with you, my brilliant one, clutching each other close, providing support for each other together, ne c'est pas? :-*
We'll help each other, luv...
I will share that hug with you, my brilliant one, clutching each other close, providing support for each other together, ne c'est pas? :-*
We'll help each other, luv...
24th Dec 2015 00:51am
We do what we do for our children.
It is very heavy being here at times;
Knowing you're not alone helps.
It is very heavy being here at times;
Knowing you're not alone helps.
24th Dec 2015 9:37pm
Ahavati, luv, you are the wisest of women for you have spoken precisely that which causes me to remain and strive and will always cause me to remain and strive: my children.
And yes, you know. Your words indicate your familiarity, and so well: it is very heavy being here at times.
Thank you for reminding me of hope, luv... :-*
And yes, you know. Your words indicate your familiarity, and so well: it is very heavy being here at times.
Thank you for reminding me of hope, luv... :-*
24th Dec 2015 1:00am
24th Dec 2015 9:39pm
24th Dec 2015 1:02am
it's spontaneity that we adhere to.
difficult to maintain schedules,
when art is not bound by such...
difficult to maintain schedules,
when art is not bound by such...
24th Dec 2015 10:22pm
Ahhh, JohnFeddeler, luv, as usual, you see clearly the heart of things.
Art is not bound by such - certainly, my very self resists those boundaries, cleaving to spontaneity... ;-p
Thank you, luv, for your clear-sighted exegesis. :-*
Art is not bound by such - certainly, my very self resists those boundaries, cleaving to spontaneity... ;-p
Thank you, luv, for your clear-sighted exegesis. :-*
24th Dec 2015 3:52am
I am NOT ok with you being so down, sooooo turn that frown upside down woman afore I come n give u a really good lickin' :)
Your displeasure is duly noted, luv. :-*
I must admit: somehow, Erotic Ninja, the threat of a really good lickin' from you soooo does not inspire any sense of dread nor does it create any desire to cease whatever behavior one is engaging in that will ensure such a thing occurs. ;-D
I'm just saying...
Thank you for providing me with that diverting thought, luv, for whatever manner of lickin' you're giving, well, mmm... ;-*
I must admit: somehow, Erotic Ninja, the threat of a really good lickin' from you soooo does not inspire any sense of dread nor does it create any desire to cease whatever behavior one is engaging in that will ensure such a thing occurs. ;-D
I'm just saying...
Thank you for providing me with that diverting thought, luv, for whatever manner of lickin' you're giving, well, mmm... ;-*
24th Dec 2015 4:33am
I am no stranger to despair and the only advice I can give is to just fight your way through it. Take it from someone who knows.
Hades
Hades
24th Dec 2015 10:35pm
HadesRising, luv, thank you so very much for your keen insight and understanding of despair.
Right you are that fighting is the only way through - tis an ongoing and treacherous battle, ne c'est pas? :-p
We are simpático in this, luv - thank you, again. :-*
Right you are that fighting is the only way through - tis an ongoing and treacherous battle, ne c'est pas? :-p
We are simpático in this, luv - thank you, again. :-*
24th Dec 2015 7:25am
There is a battle that only you can fight
as much as friends care they can't bring you to the light
But if positive energy is any aid
it has to reach you as your debt has been paid
as much as friends care they can't bring you to the light
But if positive energy is any aid
it has to reach you as your debt has been paid
Thank you ever so much, JAZZMANOR, luv, for such a lyrical reminder and the possibility of hope... :-*
Anonymous
24th Dec 2015 9:36am
one of the best pieces I've read in a while...
at least you have real talent, stay and keep going for that!
too few here like you and your kind is the best of them all.
xx brilliant poem
at least you have real talent, stay and keep going for that!
too few here like you and your kind is the best of them all.
xx brilliant poem
24th Dec 2015 7:33pm
This kind of despair might be impossible to completely shake. You make an effort through austere living but that could just be keeping up appearances. You show courage through persistence and writing about your pain so well. I just wish I had your skill Savaja.
25th Dec 2015 00:04am
Savaja one of the things I've come to accept about myself is the very strong need to be ME...even as a child I tried to conform not realising why or even that I was a little bit different...
Leaving a fourteen years abusive relationship trying to be the perfect partner gave me the strength to start peeling back the layers...my children were young...I needed to provide and provide I did and in the process began being me in amongst the conformity of society...its been a blessing and a curse (sometimes) but I wouldn't change it for the world...and neither would my kids...I've given them a different perspective...hugs to you...take care... :)
Leaving a fourteen years abusive relationship trying to be the perfect partner gave me the strength to start peeling back the layers...my children were young...I needed to provide and provide I did and in the process began being me in amongst the conformity of society...its been a blessing and a curse (sometimes) but I wouldn't change it for the world...and neither would my kids...I've given them a different perspective...hugs to you...take care... :)
Anonymous
26th Dec 2015 9:26am
A tear, a sigh, emptiness. -Hugs-
27th Dec 2015 2:40am
Hey Savaja......I can relate to this......so much in this world....we try and try and people's words or actions make us emotionally frail......they don't see the hurt they cause us.....cause their hearts have no conscience. I've silently followed you since you've been here for my own personal reasons.......I've read you fall and I've read you pick yourself up.....this write and many others show you're a fighter and not giving up.....congrats......keep fighting and venting it out.....so many other will relate to every write......you help them not feel alone.....that my friend is a tremendous feat.....luv and hugs your way xo :)
