When Hope Appeared

 

Each day
is slowly falling
away
into
some hollow place
I don't pray
why bother calling
somebody's name
who's none existing .


Hope appears
I run for it
get nowhere near
I'm sick of shit
I need to make that clear
I'm always in
a fucked up atmosphere
struggling .


Tell me the deal
is any of this real
are we just some energy
inside a minds dream
what is the strategy
other than
awake , eat , sleep
I don't ever plan
on dying an old freak
a lonely , desperate man
oh yeah , it's kind of looking bleak
I try as I can
anyway to build with hands
which play the words
that I
always write down
to grasp the worth
before it falls , to the ground
interred to the earth
which is where
we all get found
and then re-birthed
this time, for me
into a clown
I sometimes drown .


In despair
I hold on to what's right
I drag it by the hair
and force it to be mine
but it is unfair
just like this fucked up life
I get scared
of the ugly world outside
many times I've cried
but few
lay me out bare
I'm on the slide
now opened up
you see inside
give me a push
I descend
it's all too much
this is the end
is my time  finally up .