the dissonance

All of my life I've been treated as hopeless
I've been quieted down,passed up,even turned around as if I'm unworthy of being noticed
I've been called no good with no purpose
I've been held back and demoted lab led a statistic who's not worth it
Subjected to this dejection it was killing me slowly
I started losing all of my focus,second guessing all of my motives
I feared success and even found that I loathed it
I didn't care i showed for I had succumbed to all of their notions and failed victim to everything they had told me
Growing up I knew of only two emotions
I was angry and lonely
Love to me was a mystery, my happiness stolen
My family broken no father no brother nobody to showe that theirs more to this life than the path that's been chosen

I reflect,theres got to be more to me than this man that I've become, than this race the world has shun

I've gotten lost in this mayhem I've been looking for my way out
My mother I nevermade smile no father around that I could ever make proud
So it seems my presence is dreaded and disdained now
And some ppl  even say how since I was made with two bloods that has prevented me from ever being innocent
Or accomplished  regarded as totally insignificant
I felt my purpose was deminishimg and my options were so limited
I saw this phantom of failure chasing me down trying to finish me
Whether by death or by an imprisonment
My races my own worst enemies
The catalyst for so many indignities
I was blamed and shamed as if being biracial is an act of tyranny
I endured so much bigotry
In my community I was never black enough then I was hated by my other half for what? Because  we shared some history
Its never made sense to me
I was treated so differently
Still I hoped by now they had forgiven me
But look at what they did to me
They deserted and imprisoned me then attempted to murder me mentally
Now they look at me with so much sympathy
But I don't need anyone to pitty me
I'm only offering insight to a mulattos misery
Yes I know not everyone is conditioned to this type of ignorance
This is just the result of a cultural dissonance!!