deepundergroundpoetry.com
Like Your Style....
In the vast world of illusion
is all but a delusion
how to be how to know
the story behind the show
the verse that came to be
from worlds unseen
desire lust is all a bust
shaking vibrations around
relations still abound
many reasons to be
set only the mind free
no limitations awaiting
although many debating
all that is sensous
could it only be venomous
poison topics desire
setting still on fire
although sexual scores
unseen meanings open doors
6April2011
is all but a delusion
how to be how to know
the story behind the show
the verse that came to be
from worlds unseen
desire lust is all a bust
shaking vibrations around
relations still abound
many reasons to be
set only the mind free
no limitations awaiting
although many debating
all that is sensous
could it only be venomous
poison topics desire
setting still on fire
although sexual scores
unseen meanings open doors
6April2011
Published 6th Apr 2011
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Anonymous
6th Apr 2011 7:01pm
<< post removed >>
7th Jul 2011 1:11pm
7th Jul 2011 5:36pm
7th Jul 2011 6:46pm
My personal opinion is that a few commas here and there wouldn't go amiss to help with the reading. I tripped up on "how to be how to know", maybe a comma might make it an easier read? ("how to be, how to know")
Similarly, "many reasons to be"
"set only the mind free" I had to take a moment to grasp. A comma at the end of the first line might make it clearer IMO.
There's a couple of other places as well but I guess it's nothing major, just my two cents.
Similarly, "many reasons to be"
"set only the mind free" I had to take a moment to grasp. A comma at the end of the first line might make it clearer IMO.
There's a couple of other places as well but I guess it's nothing major, just my two cents.
