i'm in your english lit class(tru playa fo real)

hey what are you drinkin?                
ahahhahahheey bartender!                
4 whiskeys and a watered down cosmopolotan                  
for the lil lady                
               
put that i am all that is im i am all man and i may let you do my bidding right out there            
on my tab               
i'm a student                
intellectual                
professional thinker                
published in Juggs once                
just sayin                
               
so let's talk about the star you are                
and me the big fucking supernova whose great presence                
blinds you and you just want to explode all over you    
 
i think you got talent         
           
but i'm pretty fuckin awesome          
i chill with kenny powers   
 
so           
               
slow it down there baby                
let's make it mean something                
i'm doin my tom cruise right now                
so you don't feel some type of way
like such a whore for fucking                
a big tymer like me,LIKKE ME!                
yeah i even brought a hype man                
               
so right nows nows nows right now now nows later ons                
reruns,dvrs,on demand,past present future,88 klm per hr,            
pay per view                
               
               
we can get all einstien,time,relativity technical and metaphysical honey                
               
but you prolly dont know nuttin about that                
               
and let's not let my intellectual john stamos glamour you                
but focus on my amazing foreskin pirate raviolied penis                
it's a giant squid that winks              
               
tellin you to wink back              
with both eyes              
so when it shoots pearl ink              
we are speakin the same language        
wink wink      
wink fuckin back!!!           
               
               
it's like a secret handshake?                
               
you whore                
this is what happens when we don't discuss a safe word!            
              
i told you               
we should talk a bit first                
               
ahahahharar  ahaharararhar            
         
there we go              
               
i will tell you this though my lady                
               
time sticky as                
gum under desk                
in lecture hall 126                
sticking to your pants                
cuz you are too big for the fn seat                
               
lay off the 40's and hatin                
               
               
don't think i should say cousins are watchin                
through the hole i punched in the sheet rock
in the basement                
               
this crowd gives me cosmic colon cancer                
shots of survival like 50/50      
x girlfriend thought naked and afraid    
was what we did early tuesday morn              
the rhythm of pin cushion system symptoms                
johnny kills a soc                
great american greaser                
wasting everything on a non tangible asthetic                
               
either crash your car                
or                
cut your hair                
start wearing long sleeves on sundays                
to go somewhere and say you're sorry for something sometime  
way back when    
   
or shut the fuck up......               
               
earlier that evening                
before the gold rope had been washed with baking soda and citric acid                
               
the pretzels need to be disinfected and put out again barkeep                
these shits got sumerian sweat on em                
               
i don't see this comet comin around again soon              
she likes it nice and salty                
i'm wearing extra aftershaves                
hi 5 if you think she'll notice                
straight petroleum jelly to get the pencil thin part                
on the dew                
with moustache hairs experienced,expensive, perfect like that pack of grey pins you put your face in on my boss's desk              
humble enough to not challenge the gods or irritate a nostril      
bet letttin the world know i'm right here      
check my all powerful full mortal lips      
and lower jaw               
just saying bouaawewwaa! cikida slaaaap!  hard cider....              
can't look away like a good version of it's not cold soars or acne?????          
but               
look at this perfect dimple ass crack chin                
you couldn't buy this in Hollywood baby        
pimpier than purple rain      
     
like prince and micheal were twins      
who had a brother      
and i was the third child        
but they were both danny devito      
and i'm the ultimate arnold swarzenegger      
we're just all light skinned               
               
so enough about me                
really you too                
ok                
               
people always telling me things                
i'm always questioned but never answered                
how's a crossing guard suppost to get a job 1000 ft from a school?                
               
it's my week to pay for fish nuggets on thursday's                
D and D extravaganza                
gramma fixed the hole in my boba fet pajammas with feet on the bottom                
uncle hugs everybody helped me clean the basement    
               
you can come if you want?          
     
   
           
               
and i think we all know what happened after that...........yeah                
               
she picked up the tab and we lived happily ever after.........