deepundergroundpoetry.com
The Ragged Stars
"The stars were ragged in your
presence, dear."
Your lips, like lovingly
scalpeled roses.
Your eyes, the succinctly
corroded color of ruin.
Am I blind? Or am I
just so damn in love
that I could leave this
big green and blue uterus
without even knowing?
presence, dear."
Your lips, like lovingly
scalpeled roses.
Your eyes, the succinctly
corroded color of ruin.
Am I blind? Or am I
just so damn in love
that I could leave this
big green and blue uterus
without even knowing?
Published 31st Mar 2011
| Edited 11th May 2011
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likes 6
reading list entries 0
comments 7
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Anonymous
31st Mar 2011 5:09am
You have a knack for portraying so much in so little.
I loved this part:
"Your lips, like lovingly
scalpled roses."
But, then again I loved the whole poem.
:]
I loved this part:
"Your lips, like lovingly
scalpled roses."
But, then again I loved the whole poem.
:]
31st Mar 2011 5:13am
31st Mar 2011 10:04am
"corroded color of ruin" as a description for eye-colour. But like Cori, I just liked the whole poem. Excellent.
1st Apr 2011 4:00am
Anonymous
1st Apr 2011 4:24pm
This is perfect. No comment could do the sentiment, so brutally real and potent, the uniqueness of the similes, the clear yet surreal narrative justice, so I'll simply say that I adored it.
3rd Apr 2011 8:55am
22nd Apr 2011 9:44am
