-the doom you desire

the captivation of dominance & submission. darkly erotic...

thanks for the visit John, I always enjoy your comments...

A true piece of eroticism.
Cheers...Harry

hey, nice to meet you Harry, thanks for the visit sir...

firstly, i think everyone in the gym just heard me go "oh god, fuck yes" >.<

"in my hundred hand
you're mine now grasp
from behind"

just did me in completely, sugar... really loved this, made my morning xo♥xo♥xo

p.s your voice is my undoing

Thanks sweetheart, thrilled you like it of course... =)  
   
I think I actually changed the reading for some editing I did after you added to the list...  
   
"p.s your voice is my undoing"
 
  that's why I do it =)

very erotic and nice writing, I love this poem

Thanks a lot for stopping by Malin...

I think I'd better leave
erotic verse out of my
repertoire, I couldn't
compete..:)

Great stuff, Fen..!

haha thanks Paul...

...gorgeous ink, Fenom!
Sexy and sensual! Enjoyed this hun....Xo

Thanks so much Rain for the visit =)

Your comment left me a bit speechless, lol...
 
katja has a similar reaction to my voice, actually, and I like to exploit it to keep her full attention ;)
 
such kind words Lily, I appreciate them, and the visit...

I remember we spoke a long time ago about your man. I hope everything has worked out for you...

Oh my. You have quite the growl there don't you. My only advice audio wise would be not to rush it too much. With bass tones like that you can afford to take your time a little.  
 
*regains a little composure* That aside...  
 
"bated breath quivers  
diminish flailing limb struggle" - I stumble over this line. When you read it out loud it comes across as one long line, and the words just don't come together. May I suggest a comma after 'quivers' and writing 'diminished, while failing limbs struggle'. Would just make it a little easier to read.

Similarly with 'you're mine now grasp' adding the word 'to' to read 'you're mine now to grasp' would enhance the sentence into a more tangible grip.
 
You have some gems in here also. For example 'a foreshadowing fog of lechery' and 'animalistic debauchery'. Really gives this piece a primal feel.
 
All of this is just my own honest opinion and you of course don't have to listen to any of it.  
 
Thank you for the read.

Thank you so much for such an articulated response...     
    
Yes, I do need to work on my reading. I do tend to talk to fast, and my voice can meld words together...  
 
Not sure I agree about the bated breath sentence, they are meant to go together.
 
 As far as the 'you're mine now grasp' adding 'to' seems wrong, it almost feels like i'm asking when that's exactly opposite the effect I want. I'm only describing my grasp.  
    
ohh, and primal was exactly what I was shooting for, thank you!     
    
Thanks a lot for the critiques, and stopping in Miss Sub

This left me speechless and that voice damn, love this so much!

Thanks you so much for the visit and kind words wethebegotten...

Oh. My.  
 
I may have just lost some ability to articulate easily.  
 
Then again... :-*
 
Perhaps, I'm recovering.  
 
Fenom (DiscipleofLife), you are a magnificent primordial beast wielding a wickedly sharp scythe of a mind. Your poetry is erotically charged, thrilling, yet distinctly unsafe. Danger abounds. I'm unsettled and wet, which leaves me in a quandary and really tests my mettle.  
 
I'm not sure whether to linger and read more or run while I can...

Savaja, thanks for your amazing comment, and the read/listen. I think you'll find my writes have a wide range of feelings, but I did enjoy writing this piece very much...

thanks again...

Excellent erotica for the pure notion that the actions made in this piece, though obvious(my ONLY critique)are leaving a perfect amount of room for imagination, like the sound of a zipper coming undone. Excellence, Sir.

Thanks a lot for your kind words, and the visit Chris...

Jack, your comment are always well articulated, and often above and beyond...

thanks a lot for the kind words, and visit...

To capture and dominate the one that succcumbs to your animalistic desires. An eager participant , if you will. It's hot and sexy with a tinge of danger. Enjoyed.

Thanks a lot xmar

your voice is volcanic
and emulsion titanic

all within u will vanish

as u all of em banish

such a  steely one
i have yet to see one
cummmmmmmmm

Wow...

long since thanks due  clearing up all old dues

How are you...?

ef nain ==f999999999999999 and uuuuuuuuuu 10 plus or 7 minus

^^^^^^^^^ what they all said

I appreciate the kind words. Thank you…