I'm not what you think

I sit in your truck...
I'm so fucking high...
You can tell something is wrong with me
but I know you don't want to know why.
I know that you care though
you just ask if I'm okay...
maybe I'm sad or down in the dumps
it's just another fucking day.
You're my best friend
I wish that I could tell you
that I'm a piece of shit druggie
but you'd just leave me too.
Not talking to you every day
drives me crazy, drives me insane
but I nod out, not pay attention to my phone
every day is the same.
Then I accuse you of not caring
get all shitty with you...
You don't deserve the things I say
at the time I think its true.
But tonight you just looked at me smiling
put your arm around me
kissed me on the cheek
and said you were there for me.
You want me to talk to you about everything
that you'll never judge me not matter what
I believe you, my best friend
but I can't tell you, I just can not.

Lately I've been thinking
you're there for me all the time
why I'm fucking up myself
I want you to be mine.
I'm starting not to be able
to contain myself any more
but you don't want me, not like that
Though, I'm not too sure.
Call me princess, call me beautiful
wake me with your charming voice...
tell me to have the best day ever
don't be looking at other boys.
I know you're in love with me
you can deny it every day....
but the way you look at me, smiling with your eyes
wanting me to feel the same.

But my life is not together
you think you know every thing about me...
I'm hiding something I don't think you would guess
I wish you could just see.....
I'm better than what I'm doing
some day I will deserve you
until then, my best friend...
I'll do anything for you.

I love you, Mike.