Foolish turn

Do I have to die to find myself 
Do I really have to just to see what I can do
I look at the future and see my past
The walls close in and my face becomes a lie
The things I have done are wrong
Depressed at this age is not good for me
Who do I turn to at this point
I'm lost and the map is in hell
I can't dive down there and search for it at this point
So many different directions and I can only see one
All the lies that you can see through my eyes become the truth
My friends are lost and I have to find them
My family is far,but I'm running and they get more farther
Welcome to my world,where my spirit is roaming around 
My mind is exposed to the ugly
I'm foolish like a drunk man
I turn around and everything is Gone