deepundergroundpoetry.com
Seed of Kindness
Listen to me closely
As I speak what must be spoken
It’s a knowledge we all contain
The silence has finally been broken
Open your eyes
Look around, what do you see?
I see misery, torture everywhere
And anywhere it could possibly be
There is hope
I also see a light
A light to lead the way
It shines so bright
No, it is not God’s light
Or any religious sphere
It’s just a light that reflects
The kindness of a person near
Not just anyone
Can fashion a light so bright
Only one distinctly pure
Who wishes no one to blight
Each and every single person
Carries a seed of this within
It just needs a little nurturing
To blossom without sin
So think about this seed
When you put yourself first
It cannot grow while
Hate and sin still thirst
As I speak what must be spoken
It’s a knowledge we all contain
The silence has finally been broken
Open your eyes
Look around, what do you see?
I see misery, torture everywhere
And anywhere it could possibly be
There is hope
I also see a light
A light to lead the way
It shines so bright
No, it is not God’s light
Or any religious sphere
It’s just a light that reflects
The kindness of a person near
Not just anyone
Can fashion a light so bright
Only one distinctly pure
Who wishes no one to blight
Each and every single person
Carries a seed of this within
It just needs a little nurturing
To blossom without sin
So think about this seed
When you put yourself first
It cannot grow while
Hate and sin still thirst
Published 29th Oct 2013
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The author encourages honest critique.
29th Oct 2013 8:13pm
Firstly - welcome to DUP! *fan fare* I hope you enjoy it here.
Secondly, great message!! Your poem is pure truth, and a lecture we should all take into thought. You have a really nice flow, and I, in no offence to religious people, liked very much that your poem contains the message that it's not up to God (if there is one) to save us. The responsibility lies within ourselves.
Secondly, great message!! Your poem is pure truth, and a lecture we should all take into thought. You have a really nice flow, and I, in no offence to religious people, liked very much that your poem contains the message that it's not up to God (if there is one) to save us. The responsibility lies within ourselves.
29th Oct 2013 10:02pm
Thanks. I don't really believe in God and I'm sick of people relying on him, saying everything's his will. No. Everything is the way it is because someone made a choice, either good or bad.
29th Oct 2013 8:17pm
Anonymous
- Edited 29th Oct 2013 11:51pm
29th Oct 2013 10:10pm
Listen to me closely (why not just skip to the seed?)
As I speak what must be spoken (okay so long as this contains a seed )
It’s a knowledge we all contain ( so why waste time listening to you closely? When it's a knowledge already contained?)
The silence has finally been broken ( hmm...sounds as though " gold " has been broken)
Open your eyes ( they've been open)
Look around, what do you see? ( People sipping and smoking)
I see misery, torture everywhere
And anywhere it could possibly be (unless maybe people just sipping and smoking)
There is hope
I also see a light (yeh)
A light to lead the way (nay)
It shines so bright (okay)
No, it is not God’s light
Or any religious sphere
It’s just a light that reflects
The kindness of a person near ( or maybe a reflection of ones already contained inner light)
Not just anyone
Can fashion a light so bright (not sure I'm feeling a light being fashioned)
Only one distinctly pure
Who wishes no one to blight ( sounds wolf in sheep's clothing to me)
Each and every single person
Carries a seed of this within (yeh)
It just needs a little nurturing
To blossom without sin (without sin?)
(Luck with that one)
So think about this seed (guess you mean " your own seed " )
When you put yourself first
It cannot grow while
Hate and sin still thirst
( Why sure it can, just choose not to feed em)
well hey welcome to this dup
As I speak what must be spoken (okay so long as this contains a seed )
It’s a knowledge we all contain ( so why waste time listening to you closely? When it's a knowledge already contained?)
The silence has finally been broken ( hmm...sounds as though " gold " has been broken)
Open your eyes ( they've been open)
Look around, what do you see? ( People sipping and smoking)
I see misery, torture everywhere
And anywhere it could possibly be (unless maybe people just sipping and smoking)
There is hope
I also see a light (yeh)
A light to lead the way (nay)
It shines so bright (okay)
No, it is not God’s light
Or any religious sphere
It’s just a light that reflects
The kindness of a person near ( or maybe a reflection of ones already contained inner light)
Not just anyone
Can fashion a light so bright (not sure I'm feeling a light being fashioned)
Only one distinctly pure
Who wishes no one to blight ( sounds wolf in sheep's clothing to me)
Each and every single person
Carries a seed of this within (yeh)
It just needs a little nurturing
To blossom without sin (without sin?)
(Luck with that one)
So think about this seed (guess you mean " your own seed " )
When you put yourself first
It cannot grow while
Hate and sin still thirst
( Why sure it can, just choose not to feed em)
well hey welcome to this dup
