deepundergroundpoetry.com
The After Mask
What audacity stares deep into the blackness
still and chilling on a cabernet summers night
punishing gluttony with a cup full of emptiness
pouring it over in attempts to know where home is
rite...
it is schism
And within it's division one becomes two
fractured, where You behold splinters
prick thickening jabs that ooze all hidden truths
you denied while trying to abstain from that moment
listen...
you know the sound
you heard it as a child breaking apart
glass hallowed vases shaped perfectly
where stems snap violently pouring out
blooming roses dipped in taffeta wrapping
faith...
dyed as awareness
forever protected as knowledge
in a place where only a hole gives
you lean back and sigh crying deliverance
as your thrust forward in life one more step
beyond...
still and chilling on a cabernet summers night
punishing gluttony with a cup full of emptiness
pouring it over in attempts to know where home is
rite...
it is schism
And within it's division one becomes two
fractured, where You behold splinters
prick thickening jabs that ooze all hidden truths
you denied while trying to abstain from that moment
listen...
you know the sound
you heard it as a child breaking apart
glass hallowed vases shaped perfectly
where stems snap violently pouring out
blooming roses dipped in taffeta wrapping
faith...
dyed as awareness
forever protected as knowledge
in a place where only a hole gives
you lean back and sigh crying deliverance
as your thrust forward in life one more step
beyond...
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 9
reading list entries 1
comments 20
reads 880
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The author encourages honest critique.
Re: The After Mask
5th Sep 2013 00:14am
Re: The After Mask
5th Sep 2013 00:57am
re: Re: The After Mask
Re: The After Mask
Anonymous
5th Sep 2013 2:26am
prick thickening jabs that ooze all hidden truths
well done soul...good luck in the comp...man, keep writing!
strider
well done soul...good luck in the comp...man, keep writing!
strider
1
re: Re: The After Mask
5th Sep 2013 3:04am
lol thank You Sir indeed I try...mostly drafts of ill fitted sentences and ideas collecting dust-I Greatly appreciate that!!!
Re: The After Mask
5th Sep 2013 7:00am
It can be a struggle but a must Soul. Great write.
All the best in the comp.
All the best in the comp.
1
re: Re: The After Mask
6th Sep 2013 00:05am
Re: The After Mask
Anonymous
5th Sep 2013 7:06am
This was so good. The mood was so well drawn.
1
re: Re: The After Mask
6th Sep 2013 00:07am
Re: The After Mask
Anonymous
5th Sep 2013 7:33am
This poem has a lot of depth, Soul,I like the change of the atmosphere, how it suddenly changes into a fate unknown at the beginning, however and what ever, there is always the after taste of things...
1
re: Re: The After Mask
6th Sep 2013 00:10am
Thank You for reading me Dear Queen-always thankful And for knowledge...but sometimes it should be easier to obtain...
Re: The After Mask
6th Sep 2013 2:36am
Amazing pen Soul, you just kept creating magic
where You behold splinters
prick thickening jabs that ooze all hidden truths
you denied while trying to abstain from that moment
Deep
Good luck
G
where You behold splinters
prick thickening jabs that ooze all hidden truths
you denied while trying to abstain from that moment
Deep
Good luck
G
1
re: Re: The After Mask
6th Sep 2013 3:02am
Re: The After Mask
8th Sep 2013 4:46am
A bit darker and more haunting than your romantic work but awesome images and terrific lines throughout like, "in a place where only a hole gives." I really dig your dark side, Soulman. Very nice !
1
re: Re: The After Mask
9th Sep 2013 00:41am
Thanks Tony Man!!!!
I'd like to venture more into darker writes...but most of those come off depressive hahaha i'd rather go in the Horror or thriller direction...but You know how it goes...mostly depends on mood and how the mind jives-mine tends to be cloudy :)
Much appreciated Sir!!!
I'd like to venture more into darker writes...but most of those come off depressive hahaha i'd rather go in the Horror or thriller direction...but You know how it goes...mostly depends on mood and how the mind jives-mine tends to be cloudy :)
Much appreciated Sir!!!
Re: The After Mask
24th Oct 2013 9:27pm
re: Re: The After Mask
25th Oct 2013 00:53am
re: re: Re: The After Mask
25th Oct 2013 2:00am
Re: The After Mask
28th Oct 2013 6:48am
Fav lines:
"punishing gluttony with a cup full of emptiness
pouring it over in attempts to know where home is"
So the dark write gets my attention, not surprising, really... lol
Skilfully written, although it could use one or two commas for flow. Some strong ideas shining through.
"punishing gluttony with a cup full of emptiness
pouring it over in attempts to know where home is"
So the dark write gets my attention, not surprising, really... lol
Skilfully written, although it could use one or two commas for flow. Some strong ideas shining through.
1
re: Re: The After Mask
28th Oct 2013 1:15pm
I appreciate Your advice and stopping by Atakti...thats deeply!!!
yeah...sigh...commas...i have a disdain for them little eyelashes...but i do understand!!!
Greatly appreciate You!!!
yeah...sigh...commas...i have a disdain for them little eyelashes...but i do understand!!!
Greatly appreciate You!!!