Wallowing in Gray

I've seen my world in different shades.

Every color becoming my own personal parade.

I've seen flowers wilt in spring.

The sun turning black, making it so hard to see.

Ignorance was my bliss before you taught me this.

You taught me things that I shouldn't know.

I walk the street with a plastic mask.

Contemplating the present and past.

With every tear shed, hidden behind a wall of skin.

Every scar sewn with needle and thread.

All their imperfections are flawless instead.

Wallowing in gray is where I've been condemned.

Tossing in the filthy mud to keep the flies away.

Dunking underwater so they may not see.

The bitter drops of vodka flowing through my teeth.

The poison darts in my skin.

Drug spreading, trying to kill my within.

I hate seeming like a weeping widow.

But sometimes looking pleasant disguises the present.

Causing the future to collapse.

Wallowing in gray is where I wish to stay.

Until the sun rises, I wait another day.