Submissions by mountaingirl

I pray for grace
in the midst of this disgrace
Locked away by my own accord

I know the steps I need to take
the road most travled, except for me

I want to be alone,
but still surrounded by the fingertips of the heavy touch of my kin

I feel the pull of the outside world,
and where my place is in it
Yet over and over, I turn a cold cheek to its over reaching warmth.

The barrell no longer has a bottom,
so its all rebuilding from here.

What other container can hold all of my excesses?

Upon first glance,
the wheatgrass sways wholly with the wind.
Bending, twisting, opening up like the nimblest of dancers.
Hues of green, brown, purples, and blues
invite me to walk as slowly as I please.
Feeling the tufted tops tickle my thighs and caress my ankles as I walk.
I get lost in this vastness, this heaven on earth.
Lie down and disappear, camouflaged to the ground,sun kissed cheeks, wind blown body.
This is my most peaceful of places, where my dreams come to be born, where god touches me, where my soul comes to be cleansed.
Nightmares also awaken...

You make me want to rip my skin off and crawl out of my body
You make me want to rip your clothes off and invite you in.
You make me so happy, I want to leave the state, change my number, and possibly create a new identity.
Only to come home, call you, and reassume my old self.
When I see you, I want to scream and run.
Sometimes, into your arms and sometimes as far away from you as I can possibly get.
You make me cry myself to sleep, make me feel indifferent about our love, think youre a terrible human being, and then call you to say goodnight.