what does anxiety feel like?

So as someone who has more anxiety than is good for me I am curious as to how you would poetically describe what it feels like to have anxiety.  Whether you get panic attacks or just have general anxiety tell me how it feels!  

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Try not to worry and be happy! (yeah.. i said it!)

disinigreating time

sitting at the table...with not a word in her head.
annoyed by whats come to her..
she feels as if there is not much left to do or say..
her tears fall from the thoughts of her broken heart.
everything has torn her apart.
though the years she has not picked up a pin
and paper.
putting the pain into beautiful words.
waves of waters come from her shattered self
her image no longer her..
she..who might she be??
but holds herself as this toutering
gain has rising over her.
this blanket of madness..blanket of fears
black rose red the color of tears.
still beside this window alone
she will stay
without a pin or paper to to express what to say.
the song will continue mightnight to noon
and she wil be drowning in motionless dismay.
she will pray.. again today
still this feeling has not disapered..
only it began to take a tole.
she feel herself changing
rearranging
what once was her couplet rhyme is know
her verse of disinigreating time..
sitting at the table...with not a word in her head.
letting mindless behavor swollow her dead

-kumiko yamamoto


please forgive my spelling i studdy english everday
and have many more work similar to catagory

Anxiety

To wear the mask of a normal man,
working and doing as everyone can.
You do not see the frozen sides,
a life crippled by the hidden enemy.
To be in the grip of numbing fear,
anxiety's minion claws in me,
unable to act on my own,
tucked in the fetal is my safe zone.

Contracts and pleasure, these alone,
are executed with fresh abandon.
All else is the enemy, life undone,
by things that may never come.
So many options, few are taken,
so much to do, nothing is done.
This is the outcome of an evil foe,
the mind turned in fear against itself.

Here is the cruelest joke of all,
the ace card of the enemy,
I'd rather die than fully confront
the hidden hand of my opponent.
If I should go, people will want to know,
why did he leave too early?
Answer them this, I was too afraid of living,
and not afraid enough of dying.

boycotting all comps

Anxiety at Arm's Length

At ten years old or probably age twelve,
I started drawing on myself with blades,
To watch intently as I'd break the skin
To lick my lips as beads of rubies fell.

But cutting fascinated me no end;
I didn't even need my mother's kiss
When she would tell me it would make it well,
And then I'd go outside to ride my bike.

It never crossed my mind the reasons why,
Though none of it to do with death by snuff.
I loved my family, did I love myself?
I didn't want to die, I was too young.

But cutting fascinated me no end;
Though I did not know then it had a name,
Or even if my father was to blame
Because it was his razor blades I used.

I knew I had to hide when I would cut,
Not 'cause I thought it wrong or even bad.
I loved the way it felt across my arms
And didn't want to share with anyone.

But cutting fascinated me no end;
And when I'd try to stop it called to me.
I'd also sneak the sheers to cut my hair
In places where the deed would never show.

Then came the day my mom walked in on me,
The shower curtain on the floor in bits,
Dad's toenail clippers clasped in my left hand.
She asked me "Why?", I answered "I don't know."

But cutting fascinated me no end;
I have the scars where once six freckles were,
As I attempted plastic surgery
With double-edge and sewing thread on me.

"Am I not pretty now?", the tomboy asks,
With lovely eyebrows shaven to the quick.
Her image of myself reflecting back
From mirror of spattered rubies on the glass.

VARIEGATED


Prodding voices empty a smile
Feign a laugh, it takes a while
A song I wrote, but cannot sing
Because silence is deafening


Misophonia permeates me
And dysphoria enervates me


I want to be held, but never felt
A written verb for spoken word


Tapping
Tapping on the counter
Don’t want to be here anymore
Hurry up, enough of this
I just want to be alone
To quiet my head
Back to my friends
They loved me more
In season four


I am assured through prying eyes
That no one falls for harmless lies
Heard the laughter from the walls
I know that I’m the one at fault


I want to be held, but never felt
A written verb for spoken word


Tell me that I’m ever sane
My heart in pools of the rain
Dripping from the void I made
When life is but a masquerade
This time that always seems to fade
The debt of breath I slowly pay
Striations of time that clearly say
‘Your death is but a day away’


I want to be held, but never felt
A written verb for spoken word
Can’t take this anymore
Let me sleep

Buried Alive

the sound builds
an ever growing tower
pushing the air
from my lungs
I can't breathe!
can't think!
I need to scream
someone...
please
turn the racket down
can't you reach
the switch
in the back
of my mind?
too many people
too many thoughts
so much pressure
building up
I can't breathe
please
help me dig
I'm buried
alive!

Thank you to all those who have submitted poems this far! <3

Anxiety is a cage, a box with no air. Its a silent paranoid suffocation. Its a prison or castle. Its a haunting. Its a place inside that locks up and the lock freezes over and over until it becomes unbreakable, impenetrable. I black out the windows and bar the doors and for days or weeks I have an anonymous existence. I lurk in the shadows of my own hallways, jailed inside my own home. Every crinkle of a leaf outside my home, every car door, every laugh from the bright world outside, sends my stomach swirling into a sickness no one understands. Who is coming to do me harm I wonder from inside my dark fort. I put ink to paper, trying to medicate my collapse, this works temporarily, until the next sound invades my world, until the next knock on the door, until the next possible scenario plays out in my mind, like a silent picture with only white noise and distorted imagery. I might hide inside my bed, if I'm lucky enough to fall to sleep. I might turn the music high inside my headphones if I get the chance. But for the most part I cower inside my home terrified of callers and clocks. When it passes I will open the curtains and walk out of my home and no one will know where I have been, I will have an excuse of Course and its normally accepted. No one questions me or digs deeper than I can take. This suits me well, this allows me to be the girl you see and the truth you don't. Its the only way I know how to do life. I feel far too much for a world so void of love.

http://i1290.photobucket.com/albums/b536/1willybugger/StressedOutFace_zpseydknpkm.jpg

ANXIETY

I’m about to give up
I’m going to pass out
I’m falling into a vortex
I’m overwhelmed by doubt

Night sweats I’m bathed
Insomnia my body incased
Rapid chest palpitations
Restless legs plagued

Butterflies in my guts,
I’ve got swollen tongue
Nausea stomach cramps
I’m going to barf on someone

Heart pounding, knees shaking
I’m having trouble breathing
I’m losing control, panic attack
I’m hyper hyperventilating

I’m going crazy
I’m letting go
Like something catastrophic
Is going to swallow me whole

Is this anxiety or am I dying?
Please Doctor give me something

I just want quiet
I just want loud
somebody please
don't make a sound.

I just want water
I just want bread
somebody please
stop this pounding in my head.

I just want to cry
I just want to smile
somebody please
what number to dial?

I just want a friend
I just want to be alone
somebody please
pick up the phone.

I just want warmth
I just want cold
somebody please
I need to be told.

I just want hope
I just want to end
somebody please
tell me how to mend...

PANIC ATTACK

Bliss around me
I wish that I could share this....
A simple view that all should see...
....OH SHIT!!!...
An invisible claw tears into my chest
tearing away sanity in one quick clench
Dizzy falling madness
Pushed off from a cliff
falling from an airplane
without a parachute
....SHIT!!!....FUCK!!!...
Both feet on the ground
yet falling and---FUCK falling-
Drowning and grasping for the
last breaths of life
Ice pressed against my neck and face
my own fist thrusting against my jaw
bruises to keep me awake
to keep me from  falling
and falling....
I'll die if I fall asleep...
Break your jaw with your flailing fist
if you must....
Stay awake before your soul hits the ground
....Oh Shit....once again.......

isolated
fully functioning
burning fears
midnight tears

streets are dark
even in sun