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The Unerotic Underground 18+ IQs Only
The_Silly_Sibyl
Jack Thomas
Forum Posts: 687
Jack Thomas
Fire of Insight
2
Joined 30th July 2015Forum Posts: 687
Poetry Contest Description
Write an unerotic poem
The poem MUST be about sex between two or more consenting adult humans. But it must also be spectacularly unsexy. Winner is the one who contributes the unsexiest poem.
For example:
Two bodies heaving
and falling.
One sweaty
hairy
breast
slaps against its mate.
(Or is it one of yours?)
We fart in loving unison.
The cat throws up in disgust.
For example:
Two bodies heaving
and falling.
One sweaty
hairy
breast
slaps against its mate.
(Or is it one of yours?)
We fart in loving unison.
The cat throws up in disgust.
anna_grin
ANNAN
Forum Posts: 3367
ANNAN
Dangerous Mind
15
Joined 24th Mar 2013Forum Posts: 3367
uh i think I’ve got this
anna_grin
ANNAN
Forum Posts: 3367
ANNAN
Dangerous Mind
15
Joined 24th Mar 2013Forum Posts: 3367
sex
after some
preliminary teasing , which
had become quite same-same
the more at stake the less shameless we are
i took my broken hand and struck it lightly across your face
i was afraid you would falter
you did not
(much)
a boy says he wants one thing when he's alone
with his hand down his pants
hoping to get into yours
with his dick out, he wants to be another man
the trick is to never break your gaze
preliminary teasing , which
had become quite same-same
the more at stake the less shameless we are
i took my broken hand and struck it lightly across your face
i was afraid you would falter
you did not
(much)
a boy says he wants one thing when he's alone
with his hand down his pants
hoping to get into yours
with his dick out, he wants to be another man
the trick is to never break your gaze
Written by anna_grin
(ANNAN)
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anna_grin
ANNAN
Forum Posts: 3367
ANNAN
Dangerous Mind
15
Joined 24th Mar 2013Forum Posts: 3367
don't cry, the sex is terrible
you are the grip of a drowning boy
i want to kick your eyes
you are the thrust of a teenage porn addict
you are the wet patch
on my back while i sleep
i hate the sound of your voice
you bore me dumb. you bother me
and you cling like i am a life raft
you are stumbling in the smoking area
trying to relate to the soldier
crying while he spits
i want to drain your eyes,
snip off your tear ducts
i want to kick your eyes
you are the thrust of a teenage porn addict
you are the wet patch
on my back while i sleep
i hate the sound of your voice
you bore me dumb. you bother me
and you cling like i am a life raft
you are stumbling in the smoking area
trying to relate to the soldier
crying while he spits
i want to drain your eyes,
snip off your tear ducts
Written by anna_grin
(ANNAN)
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The_Silly_Sibyl
Jack Thomas
Forum Posts: 687
Jack Thomas
Fire of Insight
2
Joined 30th July 2015Forum Posts: 687
Thanks for the entries, Anna!
AspergerPoet56
Forum Posts: 1902
Tyrant of Words
33
Joined 4th Dec 2018Forum Posts: 1902
Fumbling Among The Alley Trash
seen through
an alcoholic haze
she almost passed
for human
balls needed emptied
even the hair
on her top lip
her masculinity
was no turn off
my need was greater
when we kissed
could taste tobacco
smell her perfune
au de stale sweat
my favourite
hand slid down
dipping into damp panties
Was it arousal
or had she peed
i didnt care
fumbling
like i was looking
for loose change
i pulled out
a sorry half hard sausage
Pushed her
Down on her knees
said in my most soberest tone
milk it baby
it's full of protien
she chewed
on it for awhile
in true
gentlenanly style
gave her all i had
an alcoholic haze
she almost passed
for human
balls needed emptied
even the hair
on her top lip
her masculinity
was no turn off
my need was greater
when we kissed
could taste tobacco
smell her perfune
au de stale sweat
my favourite
hand slid down
dipping into damp panties
Was it arousal
or had she peed
i didnt care
fumbling
like i was looking
for loose change
i pulled out
a sorry half hard sausage
Pushed her
Down on her knees
said in my most soberest tone
milk it baby
it's full of protien
she chewed
on it for awhile
in true
gentlenanly style
gave her all i had
Written by AspergerPoet56
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gardenlover
Forum Posts: 625
Fire of Insight
23
Joined 19th Aug 2012 Forum Posts: 625
Arousal
We married in the virgin state,
We both wished to procreate;
How to do it? I assume;
Plant my seed inside her womb.
We had been childhood friends;
But told that nudity offends;
We had never viewed each other bare;
Had never seen her pubic hair.
In bed together I must decide
What to do with my bride.
We explored each others flesh
She's delighted and gets fresh
Soon we discover how its done
And that it was really fun;
No looking back; from there on;
We're copulating night to dawn
We both wished to procreate;
How to do it? I assume;
Plant my seed inside her womb.
We had been childhood friends;
But told that nudity offends;
We had never viewed each other bare;
Had never seen her pubic hair.
In bed together I must decide
What to do with my bride.
We explored each others flesh
She's delighted and gets fresh
Soon we discover how its done
And that it was really fun;
No looking back; from there on;
We're copulating night to dawn
Written by gardenlover
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faithmairee
Faith Elizabeth Brigham
Forum Posts: 212
Faith Elizabeth Brigham
Tyrant of Words
12
Joined 29th Aug 2012 Forum Posts: 212
almost an affair
if we turn this thing we have
into a sordid love affair
then we may never
know what we
have missed by never
having kissed or soiled sheets
in rooms we'd just as
soon forget when love
walks out on all fours
Written by faithmairee
(Faith Elizabeth Brigham)
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The_Silly_Sibyl
Jack Thomas
Forum Posts: 687
Jack Thomas
Fire of Insight
2
Joined 30th July 2015Forum Posts: 687
Thanks for the entries, guys!
Razzerleaf
Forum Posts: 525
Fire of Insight
27
Joined 15th Sep 2019 Forum Posts: 525
Night clubs, back-alleys and all the wrong reasons
The beer-cellar smell of a daytime night club,
sticks to the stale ale carpets and painted purple corners,
dark enough to mask the taint of bleach and vomit.
But at night, the lights writhe in a snake pit of color,
sweat arcs the air like blood splatter patterns,
tunes revolve the room. Head back shot glass harmonics,
burst inhibitions in Prosecco bubbles, before they fall flat.
Outside behind the bins, the exit sign
dims and glows above a drunken clash
of teeth and hips, stricken sailing ships,
split masts wrapped around the midriff.
Below decks the crew blindly follow orders,
shot loaded and fuse set, a single cannon
separates the wrecks.
The forgotten mistake of a dank tiny flat,
clings to the smell of damp washing and nappies,
enough to hide the false smiles of the strangers.
Written by Razzerleaf
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Green_Arrow
Forum Posts: 78
Dangerous Mind
2
Joined 25th Feb 2020Forum Posts: 78
She Felt A Small Something Go Inside Her
She
felt a
small something
go inside her
which made the chick sit
up and see her man with
his face stuffed in the spot that
was in between her legs before
she looked at the scene outside that one
window still open due to rising temps.
felt a
small something
go inside her
which made the chick sit
up and see her man with
his face stuffed in the spot that
was in between her legs before
she looked at the scene outside that one
window still open due to rising temps.
Written by Green_Arrow
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Anonymous
<< post removed >>
wallyroo92
Forum Posts: 1871
Tyrant of Words
154
Joined 11th July 2012Forum Posts: 1871
Testeklees, the Greek God of Odd Balls
And so Testeklees, the Greek God of Odd Balls
Decided to throw a party and invited mortals
But this would be the biggest of Bacchanals
As it was sure to corrupt everybody’s morals
He opened the portal with a grand ol’ choral
Humans were happy to pass through the gate
But each and every one had to sign a contract
Guaranteeing that they would fully participate
They walked through the shadier side of Olympus
Until they came to the palace of the Hard Phallus
And upon entering through the great doors
They drank an energy potion from a chalice
As you would expect this made the men erect
The women became so hot, horny and wet
A desire and lust arose amidst frenzied throes
For an epic orgy and one they would never forget
And then entered the squad, a wad of odd gods
But these weren’t the ones they had envisioned
They looked kind of funky and out of shape
Some looked like they’d been decommissioned
While inside the halls the humans heeded the calls
One by a tiny Greek goddess named Abisidia
She was a dirty talker encouraging the men
To lick her and her friend they called Chlamydia
Trying to satisfy the fire between their thighs
The women laid their eyes on the entity Backusella
However they didn’t know if it was female or fun guy
But it was joined by one named Cunninghamella
Then another god who had a disgusting façade
Turned the men into some party hardy trollops
He hypnotized and commanded them to kiss and lick
But this filthy one, they called him Rectus Polyps
The fabulous and villainous Syphillis was there
She was very naughty and had many wild ideas
Making both men and women worship her body
As she was joined by her sexy lover Gonorrhea
The sound of dry heaving filled with deep grieving
Could be heard as the herd rolled in venereal disease
For a second there they thought they saw Hermes
But it was his sick and twisted distant cousin, Herpes
All the while Testeklees told ‘em “suck on these”
Warts and all as the humans were feeling awful
But they drank the potion and signed a contract
And afterward they would enjoy some Blue Waffles
Written by wallyroo92
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AspergerPoet56
Forum Posts: 1902
Tyrant of Words
33
Joined 4th Dec 2018Forum Posts: 1902
well this a complete surprise
looking at other entries didnt thibj i had a chance.
thank you appteciate it
looking at other entries didnt thibj i had a chance.
thank you appteciate it
Razzerleaf
Forum Posts: 525
Fire of Insight
27
Joined 15th Sep 2019 Forum Posts: 525
Congratulation AspergerPoet56 for being the most unerotic of us all
well done to everyone else so great poems to read, and a big thank you to Silly_Sibyl for managing and coming up with the comp.
well done to everyone else so great poems to read, and a big thank you to Silly_Sibyl for managing and coming up with the comp.