POETIC MIRROR SELFIE

.
  
   
   
The life of a sanity and insanity    
I can't see the difference    
when I'm looking at me    
   
I'm not blind,    
I can see    
I'm no inhuman    
I'm just another man    
   
But when I look at my reflection    
On YOUR mirror    
I see a hole right in the middle    
Where my heart is    
   
I don’t want you to wear my shoes    
Just try to look over your shell    
   
From yours  
To mine...  
   
Aren't we the same?    
   
Each;    
Uglier than the other    
Bloodier than the other    
Stickier than the other    
Fucked up than the other    
   
You are covered in contrast    
Mine is transparent    
   
And you say I'm MAD?    
   
   
   
Fuck you!  
   
   
   
.

I deconstructed myself long ago
And they watched as the pieces fell.
My observable chaos
The entertainment for those around me.
Curious to the nature of my own evolution,
The ascension became a necessity 
And with this awareness,
Came the beauty of the spiral.
In tune with this fractal consciousness,
I bore witness to
My own personal entropy.

               
my darkness grew              
to frightening heights              
it glowered at me              
from the mirror              
               
as i peered in              
seeing i shrunk to nothing              
i barely heard my own voice            
among the hiss & screams              
they shout while i cower              
 
trying to find my poetic pulse              
to see where i currently reside              
to see which face will greet me              
one from the dark or the light?              
               
i need my inner voice to come forward              
not a being masquerading as me              
springing forth fangs bared                
ready to attack              
               
while i fade into the shadows              
pretending i'm not here              
it's easier to let them talk              
than to get in touch              
with how i really feel              
               
so i set my soul free today              
vulnerable & quietly she comes              
carefully so not to turn a stone              
shaken but alive              
           
her life force thrums inside              
& flows onto the page              
               
to reach a soul caged              
hunkered in a corner              
with barely a whisper heard              
       
afraid of what they might say             
should their deepest thoughts be spoken            
instead of locked    
& hidden away            
             
             
             
             
             
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At the start of every day
I don't know why I feel this way
just so damn ugly, so ashamed
whenever someone calls my name

all day I fish for compliments
I never thought it'd come to this
but I don't know what else to do
I just want to be wanted,too

I wonder what is wrong with me
pure hearts in love is all I see
I smile, tell my friends I'm fine
when really I just want to die

eyes meet the mirror with dismay
I half-expect the glass to break
I realize now I ask too much
I'm too damn ugly to be touched

whore myself out for compliments
just trying to build my confidence
but I don't know what else to do
I just want to feel wanted, too

I know there's something wrong with me
I'm so much less than I want to be
but I still them I'm just fine
when all I want to do is die

Samurai Swag
     
To see what’s beyond what’s presented to my eyes and flesh,
to say yes or no when challenged by peers and plagues of society, to maintain my invisible composure when the odds are stacked against me,
my self-righteous attitude that remains
unshaken to the ignorance’s of the world,
it’s my undying confidence in myself and my abilities,
in all aspects, in all endeavors, racing past my past, accompanying my present, blazing to my future,
It’s my self-respect to do what is necessary,
which is being myself unwaivered, untainted, incorruptible,
It’s maintaining my perspective of what’s right,
disregarding blood ties, bonds of friendship,
or the capacity of love,
It is my code of honor I am forever chained to that keeps me steady and stead-fast,
It’s my courage to stand in the middle between the hurricane and the tornado without fear, to survive my storms and prepare to contest the next one,  
It’s taking an arrow to the chest but still rushing into battle, armor shinning and battle cry still loud as thunder,
It is the sharpness of my sword that slices any Ninja that attempts to cross blades with me,
It’s my way, to die by my own sword, striking myself down not allowing the evils of my enemies the opportunity ,
it is to walk the path of the warrior for it is mine to walk,
my strike steady, my form graceful, both combined with strength, accuracy and power, this is the formula for my Samurai Swag.

Freelove

when you look in the mirror
you see a reflection of yourself
you see your face
looking back at you

when i look in the mirror
i see light bouncing off a piece of glass
i see shapes and color
i see a face
a face that you say
is my face
but i don’t see it

when i imagine myself
a person i talk about
but have never met
i can see my features
the brown hair
the black boots
but i can’t see my face

when i look in the mirror
i see a face
and i turn away

when i look in the mirror
i see a face
a different face than before
and i am scared
because i don’t know
which face belongs to me