At War

im laying here
wondering
waiting
crying
pleading & trying
to fight this war
here i go again
showing all my colors
all my scars
girls are from Venus & the inevitable man is from mars
i am blessed to see passion
but my previous style of pain no longer fit's
im wearing my heart on my sleeve
& vulnerability is now my choice of
fashion
the worry sit's at the pit of my mind
who ? of all people
would want my kind?
im complex
crazy
& always captured in raptures of millions of thoughts
i am
deeper then oceans
core
somehow he see's me before i can run

my mind mentally explores the craving for a disguise
but my heart is heavy but equal to none

knives & guns
outweigh intuition..& follow like footprints of pun
tilting the hands of time
can somebody
anybody
tell me is it a crime
to go to war with yourself for fun?