deepundergroundpoetry.com
Who Was I Am
At sometime
in the past
I was myself.
I cannot
remember
me now.
I do not see
myself
in a mirror.
Bioluminescence
strokes its hair
at me.
My coal dust hands
part my lips
and the glare
of briared teeth
shun my face.
Paths that hate my feet
lay themselves open,
squandering their dirt.
And who I was
is a lost shadow
hobo cranking
laughter
in a shattered
music box.
runningturtle87
in the past
I was myself.
I cannot
remember
me now.
I do not see
myself
in a mirror.
Bioluminescence
strokes its hair
at me.
My coal dust hands
part my lips
and the glare
of briared teeth
shun my face.
Paths that hate my feet
lay themselves open,
squandering their dirt.
And who I was
is a lost shadow
hobo cranking
laughter
in a shattered
music box.
runningturtle87
Published 20th Jan 2013
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likes 8
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The author encourages honest critique.
Anonymous
20th Jan 2013 7:42pm
<< post removed >>
Anonymous
20th Jan 2013 9:04pm
I love the last stanza, in particular, in this piece & the excellent words/images in the last four lines. Wonderfully introspective poem throughout! I enjoyed reading this. :)
Carlene
Carlene
Anonymous
20th Jan 2013 9:33pm
There is a strong image of age in this poem. It's very self aware. Excellent choice of words. Enjoyed.
Anonymous
- Edited 9th Nov 2018 2:45pm
20th Jan 2013 9:48pm
<< post removed >>
21st Jan 2013 2:57am
A very classical feel here. "is a lost shadow
hobo cranking
laughter
in a shattered
music box." Quite a descriptive a telling phrase.
hobo cranking
laughter
in a shattered
music box." Quite a descriptive a telling phrase.
Anonymous
- Edited 1st May 2021 7:45am
21st Jan 2013 5:19am
<< post removed >>
21st Jan 2013 4:03pm
Sometimes, Strider, its a question I ask myself. How did I get so like this...a mere echo.
22nd Jan 2013 9:00pm
its such a brilliant work...i just love the first bit where you say that in the past i was myself...because somehow we all do think that we were ourselves in the past...but what exactly is "ourselves"? this poem jut captures the essence of it all.....
