Gone tomorrow

I have been changing, becoming who I am for far too long
now.
I have been crawling, tearing up the carpet, searching for
what it is that makes me whole.
And I keep finding people ready to hurt me, ready to kick me
to the dust.
And I have been looking to my heart for the reasons and
crying out in pain.
And I've been reaching out for sweet sounds and phrases built
to keep me sane.
 
And when its all too much the auto-destruct is far too close.
To break down and burn the bridges I have fought to defend,
To cut out the reason and blindly demolish,
Fighting because I want to,
Fighting because I can.

And I come to realise that there is nothing on the earth or
in the sky,
And I am my saviour, my sinner, my saint,
And I am who I decide to be,
And the pain in my chest is nothing but confusion,
Chemicals swirling deep in my brain.
 
And I must be a mountain, steady in the rain,
And I must be an ocean, born to swim again.
And all I ever have, all I ever need is what I can hold in my
arms and never let go,
And all that matters is what I can give to you.
For the apocalypse is here now, and we are gone tomorrow.